Hey guys. So you might remember when I posted last about my last break-up. Well it happened again. I am taking this easier than I feel I should be though and this is kind of weird. I suppose it will hit me all of a sudden.
I have had some rough times these past days though, with some quite negative thoughts etc. and I have gone to start talking to a professional about some issues.
I feel I am making good progress with my health though by just getting on with my uni work now and focusing on that, not drinking so much, cutting out other 'certain stuff' nearly completely and becoming more aware of myself again to realise who I actually am.
At the moment I was just wondering if you guys could give any advice. Because I do feel I will not get a girlfriend as good as my last again. She was so great!
This is all making it so hard for me to believe I can keep someone. They all leave me.
Plus my self-esteem isn't exactly high. I believe I was lucky to have this last one - way out of my league. Pretty, sweet, funny, so so so nice.......also Northern Irish and very cute.
Three relationships failed during my time at university. Three! And they all left me - never me leaving them.
P.S. - Rebecca who broke up with me just on Monday.... she's so nice! Like way too nice. She would never hurt anyone. She only broke up with me because I was an idiot... and I didn't realise what I was doing until it was too late.
Basically, I get a bit overbearing and argumentative because my head plays tricks on me. Like when she does something sometimes it can make me upset because I would feel like she doesn't care - even though she does, and the thing she did means nothing like that. I just over-think things through and then cause arguments about it. That's one of the reasons why I went to see someone to try and fix things. I just feel like an idiot.
Ok, first things first:
1 - accept people as they are.
2 - accept who you are but always strive to improve yourself. The ladies like you because of who you are not because of what you think you are for them. They even may have a wrong notion about you, BUT it's your duty to be transparent to them [and to everybody else, to be honest]
3 -.Everybody's been dumped multiple times. That's life. We end a relationship, some others end it for us. Sometimes we even get dumped without the courtesy of an explanation, or we are given a very lousy one - which we can automatically sense it's a lie.
IT'S OK. IT DOESN'T MATTER.
What matters is that we respect the other's decision and move on [it's pretty annoying when you have to end up a relationship and, even though you explain why you had to do so, the other just sticks around asking you over and over and over and over for a reason till that person begins to accuse you of the most nonsensical things. It's unhealthy and unnecessary]
4 - The best proof you have to know you are indeed worthy is that you had multiple relationships. Some People pray to god just to have one, if they are lucky.
5 - You sound rather mistrusting towards others [women in this case]. I dunno where that came from [probably from the same place it comes for all of us, a bad experience], but I assure you, not all people have ill intentions.
6 - tell the girl you are sorry for any harm done, but don't ask for another round. ACCEPT her decision. If she feels confident about your apology she MAY come around [remember, not everyone is a saint, and that also means not everyone is tolerant of some behaviors - and that is good. It means they have principles].
Hope it helps.
Reply to Topic
