Meatwadsprite's Slow Review Thread

Donnie Brasco (1 viewing)



Plot : An undercover FBI agent Donnie Brasco (Johnny Depp) is inserted into the mafia through the help of long time mobster Lefty (Al Pacino).

Story : What starts out as a simple plan to take down some mobster turns into a morality tale and a movie about friendship. Donnie's marriage is suffering due to him being away all the time - his wife wants to leave him : but he never really does anything to stop her. As Donnie stays undercover longer and longer he becomes friends with Lefty - who helps Donnie get in the game. As we see Lefty develope - the movie changes from a one sided FBI takedown to a character driven moral showdown. Though toward the end of the film it becomes muffled what is exactly going on : it's another ending that comes right out of nowhere and dosen't conclude anything.

Visuals : Lot of great settings and locations : with depth and scope make for a visually great standard for the whole movie. Not to say that the visualls here belong soley to the camera's : Pacino deliver such a strong performance , his facial expressions are louder than any gunshot this film has.

Sypnosis : A unique character driven under-cover moral conflict - with a dull ending : but great dialouge and amazing acting by Pacino.

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Dazed and Confused (7+ viewings)



Plot : It's the last day of school : and that means lots of different things for different aged students.

Story : Generally a hillarious and exciting movie about the last day of school. There are so many characters in this movie and each of them fleshed out and realistic , which really is the whole fun of this movie. The seniors begin their rituals of torturing the freshmen - by either humilating them with ridiuclous stunts : or chasing them down and paddling them. You really being to feel for the characters as the movie stays within the boundries of realism - espicially for a freshmen you come to know throughout the movie who is hunted down way too hard. As the school day ends and the kids start hanging out - there is a big party planned at a kids house.

Visuals : Very rich populated settings make for great visuals . With some great cinemetography that captures the excitement of every situation perfectly : plus an amazing slow motion scene.

Soundtrack : Probably the first thing that will pop into your mind when your watching this movie is it's great soundtrack - which is about 50% of the movie. All the songs fit perfect into place and complement the film amazingly.

Sypnosis : Tons of fun to be had with it's huge cast of characters and perfectly executed story.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1 viewing)



Plot : A crazed serial killer - kills his victims in their dreams : where in real life he does not exist.

Story : Though it has lots of very original ideas going on (I haven't seen many slasher-horror movies keep in mind) - it's ridiculous acting and story destroy everything good this movie has to offer. The movie starts where some friends all have similar dreams where Freddy Krueger (the crazed killer) : they eventually find out that he what harm he does to them in their dreams happens to them in real life. As they try to convince people what's happening no-one belives them : even though the evidence stacks up to a hillarious amount - which is really the most annoying thing about this movie. The acting is so underwhelming to what's going on and the murders that happen throughout the movie are treated like they aren't bad at all.



Visuals : Pretty good for the most part - which special effects that still look scary to this day. Though the general cinemetography isn't that great - aside from the few action scenes , it's defintly not the lacking part of the movie.

Sypnosis : Though I am just recently starting to watch some slasher and horror movies : the story and acting here are so bad - it's almost funny. Although I did enjoy the synthesizer heavy soundtrack.

Boo-urns to your review of NOES. It is one of a very few horror films to ever really scare me. How can you mess with Freddy? One of if not THE most recognizable horror movie icons ever???

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Suspect's Reviews

I thought it was a pretty intelligent and stylish horror flick, but he gave Hitchcock's Psycho , so you have to keep things in perspective.

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I once had a dream where Freddy Krueger recruited me to be his sidekick. Creeped me out. I didn't really want to but he kind of bullied me into it.

I can understand not grooving to its cheesy acting (Johnny Depp as the most unreliable boyfriend on the planet is pretty great though), but I actually think that one of the strengths of the movie is that it doesn't make perfect sense. That it follows a sort of dream-logic makes it a little bit creepier for me. And I love the ending.

Keep in mind, Meatwad also just doesn't like horror movies.

well I gave it a 2 : because it is a generally disturbing film - and i don't want to watch it again

but i also gave it a 4 since it is so effective - at least with nightmare on elm street when the movie is over it's stops being scary

Goodfellas (8+ viewings)



Plot : The rise and fall of of a gangster and his influence on the people around him.

Story : The movie starts with Henry Hill (Ray Liota) as a kid. He gets his first job working at a cab stand - where he works for gangsters. Eventually he starts doing some illegal jobs for them and that's when you are teleported a couple years into the future where he is now stealing a truck full of goods. As Henry rises through the mobster ranks with his two good gangster friends Jimmy Conway (Robert DeNiro) and Tommy (Joe Peschi) their minds are ever focusing on getting even more money : while their lifestyle of murdering and money becomes an obsession. This film is put together amazingly - the pacing is lightning fast : but captures an incredible amount of emotion that most films never do. The incredible amount of detail in each scene is what keeps you coming back to this movie again and again - espicially with some of the greatest characters you'll ever see on a screen.

Visuals : Though I haven't seen every Scorsese film there is - this is obviously a turning point in his visual style. It's fast and beautifully shot - and every shot counts. There are no scenes where your seeing something boring or pointless - everything has a lot of purpose behind it : and it pays off.

Sypnosis : Easily a member of the amazing gangster films group , though this one is the most realistic and closely behind the departed on it's blazing fast speed.

I Am Legend (1 viewing)



Plot : Robert Neville (Will Smith) is the last human on earth after a catastrophic virus breaks out - turning humans into zombie like creatures.

Story : The movie begins with a desolate New York city , where Neville is hunting deer with his dog - who keeps him company. As we are introduced to the isolated existance of Neville - he has dreams of times before the virus breakout , though we only briefly see what his life was like before. Toward the middle of the film it becomes more of a classic zombie thriller - when Neville first encounters the monsters. Though the film captures isolation amazingly well , it continues to follow a routine of being quiet and shocking you - over and over again : untill it loses it's focus on the main story. It then takes the over-done path of surviving zombie attacks - with a highly predictable ending.

Visuals : The huge new york setting for the film is really amazing - along with the wildlife and zombies. Obviously the film relies on these heavily when it becomes murdered with shock scenes - when the action gets tense : the shaky camera techniqe is used a lot - but is done pretty good here.

Sypnosis : Sacrifices a great idea , perfomance from Will Smith , and it's amazing New York landscape : for cheap scares , with a uninventive ending.

Lord of the Rings : Fellowship of the Ring (1 viewing)



Plot : An evil ring is passed down to a young hobbit , though coincedentaly is now the target of a powerfull (and evil) sorcerer.

Story : Bilbo Baggins is the holder of a powerfull ring that has been kept in secret for thousands of years - and has been passed around through many different hands. Though that's thrown aside to introduce The Shire - home to all the hobbits. Hobbits are basicly short humans , with unknown magical strength - they keep to themselves in the shire : none of them have actually been outside of the shire - except Bilbo (who's birthday is being celebrated). Gandalf the Grey - a wizard and Bilbo's good friend : comes to the shire for celebration. Bilbo announces that he is leaving the shire and vanishes into thin air - with the help of the ring. He leaves the ring behind for Frodo and begins his journey.

But , the ring has a mind of it's own and seeks it's evil master - while tempting anyone who comes near it that it will reward them with vast amounts of power. Gandalf quickly finds out the orgins of the ring and sends Frodo and his friend Sam on a adventure that turns into something else entirely.

Pacing : The movie is four hours in length - but it's never boring or tedious. This is due to the fact that there is so much story for the movie to explore , it's character's are all developed and you'll feel for each one of them toward the end.

Visuals : Again , the movie is four hours long - but it never ceases to amaze you. I'm pretty sure this is the biggest budget for a movie ever - and you can see where the money went. Huge gigantic scale shots of real places blended into huge CGI landscapes and then the action scenes become CGI fests as well. Peter Jackson has earned my respect as a visuall master with the amazing amount of stuff you will see in this movie.

Sypnosis : An amazing story told at a great pace with visuals that are in a leauge of their own.

Boyz N The Hood (2 viewings)



Plot : A coming of age film about a couple of friends growing up in a dangerous neighborhood.

Story : Tre Styles (Desi Arnez - Cuba Gooding Jr.) is dropped off to live at his dad's house - after living with his mom for a long while. When Tre gets there you meet his friends Doughboy (Baha Jackson - Ice Cube) and his brother Ricky (Donavan McCrarey - Morris Chesnut) - they take a walk through the neighborhood and eventually run into some big guys who take Ricky's ball. Soon after we see Doughboy driving away in a police car - for trying to steal something (probably a ball).

Seven years later - we see the same characters all grown up : and look hillariously similar to their younger-selves. Ricky even has the same type of shirt on and Doughboy has spent a long jail sentence. Ricky and Tre are in school and planned on going to college - while Doughboy hangs out on his porch with his friends and drinks liquor all day.

There is also the story of Tre's father (Laurence Fishburne) who wants to make his neighborhood a better place - and teaches Tre responsibility and how to be steady with his life. Though if he did a good enough job - you'll have to see.

Pacing : As good as the story could have been - it's told so slowly and terribly directed - with excitement lacking from any part of the film.

Visuals : Though there are some good parts every now and then - these are extremly absent from the movie at all. Incredibly dull looking everything and just not a good film visually at all.

Sypnosis : A movie with characters and a realistic sort of story - but no heart : the characters are just shells of real characters.

Southland Tales (1 viewing)



Plot : What happened , how and who the people are responsible for the end of the world.

Story : Boxer Santaros (The Rock) wakes up with a case of amnesia and starts living his supposed normal life with his girlfriend - though it all seems to be a conspiracy inside of a conspiracy inside of another one. On the other end of the story is police officer Roland Tavineer (Sean William Scott) who exists with his clone - as they find each other : though he does not understand that joining him will collapse all life on earth. The story's characters are already developed by the time the movie starts (there are three prequel graphic novels to the movie) , but you don't have to read the graphic novels to enjoy the film - I didn't anyway. This is pretty similar to Donnie Darko where in the story can be interpereted many different ways : but instead of being done like a horror/suspense movie - it's done as an exciting combination of action , comedy , and music !

Visuals : The huge fourth of july party is an amazing concept from the start - executed with gigantic CGI scale : and it's these sorts of scenes that make this movie unique. The movie also emulates a future television many times - more so to introduce the political view of the movie. Watching the trailer can give you a brief glimpse of how detailed each scene is : and how well it all blends together.

Sypnosis : An apocalyptic open ended masterpiece - with excitement and humor coming out of every corner : all to the beat of an amazing soundtrack.

My head hurts.

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mega zepplin !

Yep! Your review scanned him.

The term "more better" should be considered a weapon of mass destruction.

Thanks meatface just a suggestion check your spelling and grammar

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Buddha

I gotta say I don't agree with a single thing I've read in your entire Review Thread, Meatwadsprite. Even when we'd both give the movie 5 stars.

Your tastes and logic fascinate me.

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Horror's Not Dead
Latest Movie Review(s): Too lazy to keep this up to date. New reviews every week.

Well then my review thread is helpfull - if I like it , you won't : or you'll like it for a different reason

Ghostbusters (1 viewing)



Plot : After years of researching ghosts - a couple of unorthidox scientist encounter their first actuall ghost and quickly go into the ghost catching buisness.

Story : Dr. Verkman (Bill Murray) , Raymond (Dan Aykroyd) , and Egon (Harold Ramis) aren't getting any customers with their buisness , then one day they get their first customer who see's something crazy in her refrigerator. Though Verkman who takes the whole buisness half seriously tries to put the moves on Dana (Sigourney Weaver) who rejects him. After that buisness starts flowing in for the ghostbusters as they catch a huge amount of ghosts untill they find out why there are so many ghosts : a summoning of a powerfull demon by the name of Gozer.

Visuals : Dosen't rely heavily on it's special effects (which still have good and bad parts about them) but more so on it's great camera work. The ghosts still look great - but that's about 10 times more than I can say about the sometime hillarious 2D effects (like the laser beams).

Sypnosis : Defintly a great science fiction film - that packs lots of originality : and keeps you thinking.