An open incoherent rant letter to the morons who make phones

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Account terminated on request
Ok, all youz @#$%tarded troglodyte dufuses in the mobile phone making bidness, listen up. I've had it with your preposterous dipstick nature.

1. Please stop making phones thinner.
All you've done is make it impossibly hard to put in batteries that can really really last a long time and be economical.

And it makes you reticent to keep the 3.5mm audio port.

And it means that the phone potentially loses rigidity.

And it means that the density of electronics means that it has to go through heroic leaps of effort to stay cool, INCLUDING SLOWING ITSELF DOWN.

And it means that the cost of memory and all electronics has to be increased because of the fab cost of making ever smaller ASICS.

And it means that the DSP level amplification needed for truly tight connections can't fit in a chassis already reserved for rigidity/battery/etc.

Plus, if I find one of you, I can't smack you over the head with it without being out $1200.
2. Samsung, stop with the unbelievably useless curved display edge. It makes your phone impossible to hold without triggering the cap-sensing. UGH. Seriously, how incredibly stupid can you be? I imagine a room full of your marketing grunts all twisting their fingers up their noses to the 2nd knuckle going "duh....this would look nice.....duh....make it.....duh...."

3. Apple, stop pretending that you're the "man of the people". You've got kids everywhere that lately seem to believe that they shouldn't have to pay for anything suddenly think that you're the exception. For Christ's sake, if you made a toilet, they'd stand in line overnight for version 1 of the iDumper.

4. While we're at it Apple, along with others you were so gung-ho on the formation of USB-C, and then decided to not use it for the iPhone line. Great. So everyone *still* has to have dual adapters for your @#$% vs. everything else that needs USB style connectivity.

5. I DON'T NEED ANY MORE FRIGGEN MEGAPIXELS ON MY PHONE. Good Grief, what next?

6. Samsung, you got rid of the notification LED just so you could be wall-to-wall screen like everyone else. What's wrong, you couldn't figure out a way to put it on the side or something?

7. Give me BACK MY @#$%ing REMOVABLE BATTERY!

Your behavior over time has absolutely been a classic case of incremental stupidness.

Were you all anencephalic babies? Did you grow up under power lines?

Knock it off.

PS. I'm not a wacko.
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Movie Forums: There's Just No Accounting For Taste
Oh hell ya! MoFo needed a good rant!

Right now I'm syncing music onto my new moto z⁴. I swore I would get a Motorola after having an i-phone with the [email protected]#king lightning port.



You just need some fresh air.



Ok, all youz @#$%tarded troglodyte dufuses in the mobile phone making bidness, listen up. I've had it with your preposterous dipstick nature.

7. Give me BACK MY @#$%ing REMOVABLE BATTERY!

Your behavior over time has absolutely been a classic case of incremental stupidness.

Were you all anencephalic babies? Did you grow up under power lines?

Knock it off.

PS. I'm not a wacko.

I agree 100% about the removable battery. I can't see any advantage to the customer for the battery to not be removable. The only reason for this is to make the phone disposable if the battery fails after the warranty period.

.
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