MoFo Fantasy Football 2020 - Regular Season

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I am trying to adjust to an afternoon Wednesday game???? Do I make wings, do I drink beer? wth
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“The gladdest moment in human life, methinks, is a departure into unknown lands.” – Sir Richard Burton



Drinking every day works for me.
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We are both the source of the problem and the solution, yet we do not see ourselves in this light...



Week 13


Tom Brady and Chris Godwin are on a Bye.
Ezekiel Elliott and Todd Gurley have been frighteningly disappointing, and that's when they decide to play them. Both are hurt. Elliott just outright took himself out of his game last week on Thanksgiving. My champion first rounder.
I have to win this week vs Powdered Wilson to make the playoffs. Now why do I know, JUST KNOW, that the outcome of this game will be decided when the last player goes Tuesday night. That's Elliott, when the Cowboys are at Baltimore.
The one thing I have in my corner is that when things are obviously good or bad, something happens unexpectedly that make you question why we play fantasy sports.



Bud Dupree out for the year for the Steelers. That's after losing Devin Bush for the year. Two of their three best linebackers, yikes.

Wasn't expecting them to win out anyway (they've gotten lucky in a few already and really played down to bad teams), but this'll make it even tougher. And more importantly, it makes an early playoff exit a lot more likely. Blech.



Playoff Scenarios

In: Yoda, Hey Fredrick, Adamantium18.

Win and they're in: TONGO, Captain Spaulding, Powdered Water

Needs Help: jiraffejustin




That's it. We have exactly three spots and four teams, and everyone else is ruled out. The above would've been way more complicated if Spaulding hadn't pulled off that nutty last second win, but he did, so the situation is pretty simple compared to most years. Oh, and PW and TONGO play each other, so the loser of that bout is the person @jiraffejustin is most likely to overtake.

Why? Because Justin is third in overall points. He's got 60 points on PW, 30 on Spaulding, and 13 on TONGO. And he plays Holden, who despite a valiant effort in the face of a ton of injuries, has only topped 85 points once in the last seven weeks. A Justin win, therefore, is very likely, and it's very unlikely that PW or Spaulding could somehow lose their matchup, but still make up those point deficits. It's tough for TONGO, too, but much more plausible.

TONGO's missing some key players (Brady, Godwin), and so is Spaulding (McCaffrey still, maybe Conner), and for Spaulding Murray suddenly looks human and has a very bad on-paper matchup. But 7thson's limping into this match, too, so it's easy to imagine Spaulding nabbing his third sub-100-point victory of the year, when he needs it most. Oh, and Murray having a bad matchup means that PW's Hopkins has a rough one, too. So there's a lot to consider here.

That TONGO-PW matchup is the one to watch, because the simplest outcome is that whoever loses there loses their playoff spot to Justin.

Best of luck everyone. I realize this is a hysterical thing to say given how messy this year has been, but hopefully everyone's healthy and they get to play all the games as normally as possible.



And he plays Holden, who despite a valiant effort in the face of a ton of injuries, has only topped 85 points once in the last seven weeks.
You don't have to worry about me, anymore. This week I am doing the humane thing; taking my entire team out back and having them shot.

I know it sounds extreme but it is so much worse to see them flopping around in ineptitude and pain.
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"Film is a disease. When it infects your bloodstream it takes over as the number one hormone. It bosses the enzymes, directs the pineal gland, plays Iago to your psyche. As with heroin, the antidote to Film is more Film." - Frank Capra



I feel like I go 8-5 almost every year. Which is bad news for the big ape. The only nice thing imma gonna say to you is... North Dallas TONGO is the best team name you've ever had!



Since you asked, PW's records by year:
  • 2008: 9-5
  • 2009: 8-5
  • 2010: 5-8
  • 2011: 6-7
  • 2012: 6-7
  • 2013: 5-8
  • 2014: 7-6
  • 2015: 6-7
  • 2016: DNP
  • 2017: 9-4
  • 2018: 7-6
  • 2019: 9-4
That's a really low spread.



I keep thinking about a couple weeks ago when I left close to 50 points on my bench. If I just had one less brain fart that week, I'd have about the same amount of points as Tongo, giving myself a better chance of beating him out on a potential tiebreaker. I've got a 27-point cushion on PW, so I'm rooting for Tongo to win this week just in case I lose, but as Yoda already pointed out, Tongo is shorthanded this week.

I don't foresee myself scoring many points this week. Most of my match-ups are highlighted in red. And I'm likely facing difficult start/sit decisions again, depending on the availability of my players dealing with injures/COVID. Losing Will Fuller is a real buzzkill. He'd scored double-digits in all but two games this year.

It appears I'm catching a break with the schedule, though. @7thson is without Ronald Jones this week, and hopefully for my sake Lamar Jackson isn't cleared to play.

Once the dust settles, I could either be the #3 seed or out of the playoffs entirely. I'm just happy to be in control of my own destiny, so to speak. It looked grim before my unlikely comeback Monday night.
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My past seasonal records:

2019: 8-5 (3rd in points scored)
2018: 8-5 (3rd in points scored)
2017: 10-3 (3rd in points scored)
2016: 7-6 (7th in points scored)
2015: 10-3 (3rd in points scored)

Playoffs all five years. Hopefully that streak continues with another 8-5 finish.

[EDIT: Added my point placements after seeing jj do the same. Kinda crazy to see how many times I've finished third in points, assuming I counted correctly when quickly looking through previous seasons.)



Let the night air cool you off
My records:

2013: 11-2 (1st in points scored)
2014: 4-9 (11th in points scored)
2015: 7-6 (6th in points scored)
2016: 7-6 (3rd in points scored)
2017: DNP
2018: 6-7 (5th in points scored)
2019: 6-7 (8th in points scored)

I have been pretty mediocre with a dash of bad luck in 2016, 2018, and this year.



I feel like I go 8-5 almost every year. Which is bad news for the big ape. The only nice thing imma gonna say to you is... North Dallas TONGO is the best team name you've ever had!
AW! I thought Plastic Pads & Iron Men was a keeper, no?



Spaulding doing my favorite move of "snatch up possible last-minute replacements for my opponent" thingy, with the extra bonus move of "hold them for exactly one day so they'll go on waivers and you can cycle through more." I think I did that super hardcore to WBadger before our MoFo Bowl.

Dionne either caught nappin' a little or, just as likely, decided he's all-in on Lamar Jackson playing.



Nothing too crazy in the early going here. Most significant thing so far is that Dionne's team, which probably needs a couple of those iffier skill players to produce decent totals, hasn't had anything happen for them in the first quarter. Lotta time left, though.