Thanks so much for all the kind words, guys.
We're both very happy and really looking forward to everything.
You can be a pretty good man. As Jerry Seinfeld says "if he's the
best man, why would she marry the other guy?"
by the by Yoda... I can say now that I totally nailed you in the shoutbox a week or so ago.
*Left that one wide open for innuendo. Closing the door myself.
You really did. Just so everyone else knows: I dropped a hint in The Shoutbox thinking it would be vague enough for deniability, and a couple of MOFOS (not MoFos!) almost spoiled everything, so I had to delete their shouts.
All's well now, though.
Serves me right for dating a girl who can read, I suppose.
Okay, so now the romantic part--how'd you meet and how did you propose? A good romantic proposal will carry you a long way through a good marriage!
First off, thanks a lot for the advice, and for sharing your experiences with us. I read your post aloud to the lady and she thought it was interesting and helpful, and I agree with a lot of what you've said -- especially the part about someone having to fill the gap when the other isn't in the mood to hold up "their end." As goofy as it sounds, there was a line along these lines in the TV show
Scrubs that I always liked, about how, in good relationships, when things are bad one of the two will always stand up and "fight" to keep it going. I think that's really stuck with both of us, and it makes me feel very optimistic.
The how-we-met story is in the "significant other" thread, which I'm guessing you've seen since the post above.
The proposal story is basically this: I bought the ring months ago, and it forced me to do a mental run-through about compatability just to be safe. I realize that she's more reticent about having children than I am, so I hold off, as I don't want to pressure her, or take such a huge leap merely hoping that she'll change her mind. And, of course, I can't simply
expect her to change.
Eventually I come to the conclusion that, even if she's not sure about all those things, I want to be with her anyway. I decide this maybe a week and a half ago. We're sitting in my room on Saturday, and I start to think that it'd be a good time to ask. As soon as I decide this, my stomach churns. It was like flicking a switch.
Now, at this point we're just sitting on the bed, but the ring's hidden in the closet. I can't get it out while she's in the room. So I ask her if she'll get me a can of soda. Then I realize that that won't give me enough time, so I change my mind and ask her if she'll pour me some orange juice. I didn't want any, but I needed her to do something that would take a minute or so. So she goes (because she's nice like that), I rifle through a few boxes in the closet and grab the ring.
She comes back, I steel my nerves, and just (very) softly say "Will you marry me?" Her face gets very serious and her eyes well up, and I realize I should probably show her the ring. So I say "I, I have a ring..." and I pull it out of my pocket. She told me later that seeing the ring helped because it let her know I wasn't just asking on a whim. Which makes sense, given that there was no big ramp-up or production to it all.
She buried her face in my shoulder and cried a little. I gave her a moment and then, half-laughingly said "I just need one word from you." She smiled and nodded her head, and that was that. We both got hold of ourselves and started calling people, and here we are. It feels as right now as it did then.
Let's see the ring! Or The Ring 2!
Gladly! I went an unsual route...I didn't want to go with a diamond. I bought her a diamond necklace for Christmas a couple of years ago, and I wanted something a little different. My stepmom has a Garnet ring, and those really struck me. My little sister, funnily enough, found a few and brought them to my attention, and I chose one with an Art Deco style to it:
A little unusual, but very Victorian, and it really suits her. She loves it, thankfully (whew), but she's a very practical girl with modest tastes, anyway, which is one of the things I love about her.
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