Daniel and Weeman's Movie Commentaries

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Con Air

The first time I watched Con Air was with my older brother. I sat down ready for an action-packed film, and he said to me, “Is this the one with Leslie Nielsen?”.

Con Air, is anything but “Airplane!”, which is in a class of its own. The film is an action-adventure with sprinkles of comedy, but without Leslie Nielsen (sorry, no ‘Shirley’here). Instead, it stars Nicolas Cage playing a “Nicolas Cage type” character named Cameron Poe, an ex-army ranger who gets sent to prison for killing a man whilst brawling with him and his two drunk friends to protect his wife. Whilst in prison he makes friends with another inmate known as Baby-O (played by Mykelti Williamson), a diabetic inmate with a particular fondness of pink coconut balls. The production team behind Con Air could have used any foodstuff they wanted, but they used pink coconut balls. I’m really not sure why, are they some sort of metaphor? At least I don’t think so. They probably just really love those coconut balls. Where was I? Oh yes, diabetic friend. Anyway, Cage gets up to many activities in prison, such as “handstand press-ups”, origami and learning Spanish. Much like any other inmate at a maximum-security prison would do. Eventually, the time comes when Poe becomes eligible for parole, and so is sent on a flight home with many other prisoners, who are being transferred to a newer prison, unlike Poe. As you would expect, chaos soon ensues when the prisoners soon take control of the “Jailbird” plane. Among these prisoners are Cyrus ‘The Virus’ Grissom, brilliantly played by John Malkovich, a 39-year old who has spent 25 years of his life inside, making him fourteen when he first entered prison, which hints that he isn’t a very nice gentleman, and “Johnny-23”, played by Danny Trejo.

This plane journey is littered with gags (who doesn’t like, “I said, put the bunny back in the box”), and some decent action scenes, along with the introduction of new inmates at a stop along the way. These new inmates include Garland Greene, played by the ever-brilliant Steve Buscemi, a serial killer whom gives new meaning to the song “He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands”. I give great props to the writers and Buscemi for creating a serial killer whom I sympathise with. The scene(s) with Garland and the young girl is possibly the most creepy, harrowing, yet hilarious moment in the entire film, with the close second being Nicolas Cage’s obsession with keeping his daughter’s present, a toy bunny, safe.

Despite my biased love towards Cage and Con Air in general, there are issues with the film. The formulaic plot makes it hard to say that this is a great movie, and the action scenes, although well executed, are rather tedious and leave me wanting more variety. John Cusack, on occasion, looks stiff and uneasy in his role as Marshall Vince Larkin, and Cage doesn’t help with his constant pining for his wife and child like a clichéd teenager, despite being the best actor ever to have lived (I joke, I joke, although I still love him). There is also a reason why this film won a ‘Razzie’ for ‘Worst Reckless Disregard for Human Life and Public Property’ which, unsurprisingly, is because Con Air shows a reckless disregard for human life and public property, by crashing into Las Vegas. Not near Las Vegas, into Las Vegas. A city which also seems to be the favourite place for all of Nicolas Cage’s characters to end up.

This is not a film that’s intended to be taken seriously. Its exaggerated plot and wide use of stereotypical criminal characters (the ‘good’ prisoner, the cross-dressing feminine inmate, the criminally insane serial killer) are not supposed to be ground-breaking accomplishments. The film does what it sets out to do, and does it well. Maybe Simon Pegg’s interpretation in How To Lose Friends And Alienate People wasn’t as left-field as some make out, although, quite clearly, wrong.