0
I might as well spoiler this, it's less a review and more of a tired, grumpy rant:
WARNING: "Transformers" spoilers below
The 3D was awesome, best since Avatar (possibly better?), and there were some absolutely beautiful shots in this film. For instance the robots rising out of the ground on the moon (it's not a spoiler, it's in the trailer) and the camera floating through it... one of the most beautiful 3D shots I've seen.
It's just a shame I hated the film. I don't think I've ever seen such an incoherent mess, I was just about able to keep up (I admit my mind was wandering with boredom).
What really irritated me was that there were some good moments in it. John Malkovich's initial cameo, the Autobot spaceship escaping Cybertron was the best space battle scene since the opening of Revenge of the Sith (actually it's possibly the first space battle scene since Revenge of the Sith...), the Kraken transformer who tore down that skyscrape but more than anything else I was really impressed with the moon landing conspiracy at the start. No disrespect to Michael Bay, but that was a really inventive way of involving giant fighting robots with an incredibly important historic event, and I'm still so disappointed that it was over so quickly. It was the most interesting part of the whole franchise so far for me.
Why oh why does Bay insist on making these two and a half hour long epics? Cut the damn thing down to 90 minutes and it would be more exciting. By the time the film finally ended I was worn out from watching explosion after explosion and not knowing who any of the transformers were or what they were doing.
And why have they sidelined Megatron once again in the villain stakes? Use him! There are millions of children and adults who know who he is, and what his relationship is to Optimus, and for him to simply flit in and out while Leonard Nimoy sleepwalks through his lines was unforgivable. This was the third part in a trilogy, there should have been an epic battle between them, one on one, trading blows and trading insults until finally one stands and one falls! Why so many big budget films refuse to follow the Return of the Jedi formula for a final act I don't know, it would have worked so well here.
Instead we get a short scene where a young model tells Megatron he's a bitch, causing him to jealously beat up the only Transformer who actually brought the Autobots to their knees in these films, and as a reward he gets executed in cold blood by a frighteningly unheroic Optimus. Honestly, the character's turned into a right dick in this film.
I've got the first one on DVD from Lovefilm so I'll be watching that later, just to remind myself of what it is I saw in the first movie that convinced to keep coming back for more.
The 3D was awesome, best since Avatar (possibly better?), and there were some absolutely beautiful shots in this film. For instance the robots rising out of the ground on the moon (it's not a spoiler, it's in the trailer) and the camera floating through it... one of the most beautiful 3D shots I've seen.
It's just a shame I hated the film. I don't think I've ever seen such an incoherent mess, I was just about able to keep up (I admit my mind was wandering with boredom).
What really irritated me was that there were some good moments in it. John Malkovich's initial cameo, the Autobot spaceship escaping Cybertron was the best space battle scene since the opening of Revenge of the Sith (actually it's possibly the first space battle scene since Revenge of the Sith...), the Kraken transformer who tore down that skyscrape but more than anything else I was really impressed with the moon landing conspiracy at the start. No disrespect to Michael Bay, but that was a really inventive way of involving giant fighting robots with an incredibly important historic event, and I'm still so disappointed that it was over so quickly. It was the most interesting part of the whole franchise so far for me.
Why oh why does Bay insist on making these two and a half hour long epics? Cut the damn thing down to 90 minutes and it would be more exciting. By the time the film finally ended I was worn out from watching explosion after explosion and not knowing who any of the transformers were or what they were doing.
And why have they sidelined Megatron once again in the villain stakes? Use him! There are millions of children and adults who know who he is, and what his relationship is to Optimus, and for him to simply flit in and out while Leonard Nimoy sleepwalks through his lines was unforgivable. This was the third part in a trilogy, there should have been an epic battle between them, one on one, trading blows and trading insults until finally one stands and one falls! Why so many big budget films refuse to follow the Return of the Jedi formula for a final act I don't know, it would have worked so well here.
Instead we get a short scene where a young model tells Megatron he's a bitch, causing him to jealously beat up the only Transformer who actually brought the Autobots to their knees in these films, and as a reward he gets executed in cold blood by a frighteningly unheroic Optimus. Honestly, the character's turned into a right dick in this film.
I've got the first one on DVD from Lovefilm so I'll be watching that later, just to remind myself of what it is I saw in the first movie that convinced to keep coming back for more.
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