As this thread seems to have become miscellaneous, I will proceed to tell the story of an event that took place early this morning, a morning that will live in infamy, and an event, that will forever be called...
Grandma got runover by a scantily clothed man!!!
Early in the morning, I was awoken by the whining of my small furry dog (an overweight Welsh Corgi). Luckily, I share a lassy-like telepathic connection with this ridiculous creature, and was thusly able to quickly discern the meaning of it's plea.
Crystal (my dog, named after a hot sauce) needed to releive herself!!!! I sprung into action, throwing on a robe to cover my unmentionables, I ran to the front door. My dog can never be described as well-trained, but generally, she knows the rules of my letting her outside at 5 am, without a chaperone.
1. Do your business, and get back inside, damnit.
2. It's 5 in the morning, this is the only time you are getting outside for at least the next 4 hours, so make it count.
My dog quickly finished, and was casually trotting back to me, when the first sign of trouble appeared, her gigantic ears pricked up, and she stopped, dead in her tracks. Her head slowly turned to the source of the noise, and, as if in slow-motion, she ran out of my view, barking to the maximum extent of her little lungs.
The barking eventually stopped, so she seemed in no danger, but I still needed to get my little quadroped back into my home. I edged slowly from my apartment doorcarefully covering up my lewder body parts with the robe. From their I was able to catch a glimpse of a small part of her hindquarters, about 35 feet from my door.
I looked around, to make sure that no neighbors were watching, and made a run for her. I sprinted to my rabbit-looking puppy and grabbed her, raising her off the ground, and was about to run back to the confines of my apartment when I noticed a dark figure, standing in front of me.
I took a few steps closer, to examine it, and took in the sight of an old woman (I'd estimate 60-65) walking her chihuahah. Her ear to ear smile quickly revealed the fact that my robe tie had come undone, and my lower half, in all of it's glory, was revealed to the world, or at least this older woman standing in front of me.
I'm not sure about the relevance of this story, but I hope my tale of embarrasement has amused the sadist within.
__________________
"We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glow-worm."
--Winston Churchill
Last edited by Herod; 08-19-02 at 07:33 PM.