The Hall of Infamy

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I was on the naughty list and my punishment was watching Krampus: The Christmas Devil. I think that falls under the category of cruel and unusual punishment. Written and directed by Jason Hull, this Christmas themed horror film is about Krampus, the brother of Santa who has to punish the naughty children (like me). This film is not fun at all and is often boring, feeling longer than its runtime. The writing is mediocre at best. Performances range from flat and unconvincing to just alright. I liked Santa's performance best. Santa is a badass. Apparently the actor who played Santa, Paul Ferm, is a former Miami area homicide detective and he actually frightened one of the children and made him cry for real. There are a couple mildly interesting scenes, but this film is mostly an unsatisfying and unenjoyable mess. Bah humbug!



Just wanna say yall are really stinkin' up my Letterboxd feed lately. Jeez.
Finally, somebody other than me is ruining Captain Terror's Letterboxd feed.



People still have a couple more days to join in, but once that period is over, I'm sure SpelingError will post the exact deadline.
Yeah, I'll post the deadline this Saturday in case any more stragglers show up. It will likely be one film per week, starting from that Saturday, so you guys technically have an extra week now.



@SpelingError, I also watched and reviewed Going Overboard, but it isn't linked in the first page under my name.
He's trying to spare us all shame, and here you come yelling, "Please, you must make it abundantly known to all on the internet that I watched Going Overboard".

I was on the naughty list and my punishment was watching Krampus: The Christmas Devil. I think that falls under the category of cruel and unusual punishment. Written and directed by Jason Hull, this Christmas themed horror film is about Krampus, the brother of Santa who has to punish the naughty children (like me). This film is not fun at all and is often boring, feeling longer than its runtime. The writing is mediocre at best. Performances range from flat and unconvincing to just alright. I liked Santa's performance best. Santa is a badass. Apparently the actor who played Santa, Paul Ferm, is a former Miami area homicide detective and he actually frightened one of the children and made him cry for real. There are a couple mildly interesting scenes, but this film is mostly an unsatisfying and unenjoyable mess. Bah humbug!
I'm interested (eh, in a way) to watch this one again because I can honestly say that aside from a vague visual memory of someone walking in the woods(?) I remember nothing about this film. And yet, I scored it a 3/10. Usually movies I dislike end up being 4 or 5/10s, so I'm wondering what I found so objectionable about this one, and yet so utterly unmemorable. Welp, find out soon!





Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)
Directed by: Harold P. Warren
Starring: Harold P. Warren, Diane Mahree, John Reynolds

For the first 40 minutes or so, Manos is actually quite fun to watch because its ineptitude is unintentionally hilarious. The editing in particular had me legitimately cackling on multiple occasions. Conversations often take much longer than necessary as there are frequent pauses between lines and their responses, as though they were intended to be cut later, but never were. It reminds me of watching a stage play where the actors keep forgetting their lines.

The film's score really tries hard to amp things up when literally nothing in happening on screen, and even occasionally stops for dialogue in an abrupt, and jarring manner. Not that it needs to let us hear every word that the characters are saying, since they repeat the same things ad nauseam. It certainly reinforces the feeling that this is a rough cut that hasn't yet been pieced together properly though.

As one would expect from a production such as this, there are a number of continuity errors between scenes, some of which feel like they might even be in the wrong order. The final act in particular suffers from those issues. The plot still makes sense despite the mess, but it definitely becomes much more of a chore to sit through. It's clearly an amateur attempt at film making, but overall I don't think it's quite the trainwreck its reputation suggests.


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Mano: Hands of Fate, 1966

A family (Hal Warren, Diane Adelson, Jackey Neyman Jones) gets turned around on the way to vacation and end up in a strange desert property where a creepy caretaker (John Reynolds) awaits the arrival of a mysterious master (Tom Neyman).

At this point, what can a person even say about Manos that hasn't been said before (and probably better) by the legions of people who have flocked to it as one of the infamous worst films ever made.

The only movies I truly hate are those with loathsome messages or exploitative content. But Manos really is something special. It's the kind of movie you forget you're watching while you are watching it. I kept slightly zoning out, and then I'd snap back to attention and, yep, the nightgown-clad women are still somehow slowly wrestling on the desert floor.

What does "elevate" this movie in bad-movie status is the way that it does manage to resist some so-bad-it's-good stuff. Sure, whenever people say or do anything on screen, chances are you can get a good laugh out of it. But there are long, inexplicable lulls between those words or actions. Often this is down to editing or actors missing cues or something. Someone will say something and then just . . . wait in silence for another person to speak or for the camera to cut. At times this is funny--when for example a scene would demand some kind of urgency--but often it's just totally dull.

The trivia about the film is also kind of like a gift that keeps on giving. All of the voices of female characters were dubbed by the same actress?!

One element that makes bagging on the film a little less fun is knowing that Reynolds died of suicide after completing the film (not necessarily connected, but still . . .). Being asked to play the weirdest character in an inept movie puts a lot of weight on him, and I wish there were a less tragic backstory to the actor/character.

Something that was a little hard for me is that I've seen the MST3K episode twice, and the phrase "I don't want to see Torgo in anything sheer" lives rent-free in my brain. So I didn't enjoy the movie itself, per se, but I have positive associations with watching it, if that makes sense. I also have kind of a soft spot for no-budget productions.

Good job, absolutely terrible!



Infamy: 1/2



28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
I shall start looking for these films tomorrow!!!!

I suspect I will tolerate one or two.
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