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Omni, I think Cob said much of what I would've. When my grandma died what I felt was relief. Relief that she was no longer like that. I'm still not sad that she died. If anything, I think I did my grieving years before she died, after the person I knew and loved wasn't really there anymore.

You feel what you feel. What you do about those feelings are things you can control, but the feeling are what they are.
I kind of had an awkward moment this past week where someone I hadn't seen in a while asked me directly about her, since she knew they were my only real family. I told her straight up that she had just died and, well... some other people I hang around for nonspecific reasons overheard and there was just recently a big thing about one of them taking over a week of time away to grieve when one of their relatives also died.

I didn't take any time away. And I didn't tell anybody either. ( o_o)
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I was gonna say, though it seems kinda messed up in that way.
Dont be critical of yourself thats how were all built. Take your situation and picture a friend going thru it instead, reacting exactly like you have. You think awful things of your friend? No. Because thats when youre not being critical and more objective. People are mostly critical of themselves, its tough not to judge yourself.
Anyway homie youre human



It's not messed up. It's how people deal with stuff. For some it's music, for others sport. Whatever it is, most people will have a way of dealing with their emotions when they're not 'doing it in the normal/expected/traditional' way.

In the same way that there isn't a set amount of time to grieve, neither is there a set way to do it.
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If you can be stoic about death, more power to ya, I say. If you can face the deaths of people head on and it's not scary and doesn't make you cry... badass!

Death is the norm. Death happens to all of us. And it ain't pretty. If there's anything sexy about my death when it happens, I've won a lottery.

Sci-Fi Slob, you once made me watch a video of two Mexican men actually getting murdered via chainsaw and hunting knife. One of those disturbing LiveLeak things of yours. You like morbid stuff. Well, here's morbid for ya. Tough it out and get back to drinking and making a fool of yourself on the forum. Life is a murder show. God - or nature - kills everybody we know and your time's coming, too. We're all in one great big horror movie. The worst one of all, because everybody dies. EVERYBODY.

So get better soon and get ready 'cause more deaths are comin'. Eventually, you'll probably get used to it. And hey - the idea of death isn't always so terrible. If death didn't exist, people you hate would never go away. They'd be here forever. It's like a free stress ball God hands to all that participate in his life thing. We can fantasize about people dying. We do it through movies sometimes, in fact.

So cheer up. Death is just the Facebook friend you can't get rid of.



In the same way that there isn't a set amount of time to grieve, neither is there a set way to do it.
I can dig that.



Originally Posted by Sexy Celebrity
Death is just the Facebook friend you can't get rid of.
Good thing I'm not on Facebook.



Sorry to hear your news SFS. Those last images of someone you love before they die can be really shocking and never leave you, but you'll get back all the good memories too in time. Glad you're staying with your family. Take care x

Omni, I agree with the others . People deal with the deaths of family and others close to them in loads of different ways. Some people go completely to pieces, some just get on with their lives. There's no right and wrong way to feel about death, it's all about how you deal with it not about the people around you thinking how you should be.



If you can be stoic about death, more power to ya, I say. If you can face the deaths of people head on and it's not scary and doesn't make you cry... badass!

Death is the norm. Death happens to all of us. And it ain't pretty. If there's anything sexy about my death when it happens, I've won a lottery.

Sci-Fi Slob, you once made me watch a video of two Mexican men actually getting murdered via chainsaw and hunting knife. One of those disturbing LiveLeak things of yours. You like morbid stuff. Well, here's morbid for ya. Tough it out and get back to drinking and making a fool of yourself on the forum. Life is a murder show. God - or nature - kills everybody we know and your time's coming, too. We're all in one great big horror movie. The worst one of all, because everybody dies. EVERYBODY.

So get better soon and get ready 'cause more deaths are comin'. Eventually, you'll probably get used to it. And hey - the idea of death isn't always so terrible. If death didn't exist, people you hate would never go away. They'd be here forever. It's like a free stress ball God hands to all that participate in his life thing. We can fantasize about people dying. We do it through movies sometimes, in fact.

So cheer up. Death is just the Facebook friend you can't get rid of.
Is that supposed to be funny?



Chappie doesn't like the real world
There are many people who kind of feel disconnected from potentially emotional events in their lives. It doesn't automatically mean you're a sociopath or anything like that.

I've felt like that many times in my life and I'm quite sure I'm a pretty normal person. Many people have to deal with periods of emotional indifference from time to time. It doesn't make you a bad person. You can't choose what you feel.
Sorry for your loss, SFS. I wish I had never went to see my friend in the hospital. I don't like having that memory in my head and he didn't know I was there anyway.

Your really right on about this, Cob. I'm pretty in tune with it because I have been seeing a shrink forever, but sometimes you do disconnect and not feel anything for a long time. Sometimes things come out in very unexpected ways and you may not realize that you are grieving over something that happened a long time ago unless you really can sort it all out in your head. Sometimes, you just aren't really bothered by a death because it is the natural order of things and you feel ok about it. Nothing is right or wrong.



it's all about how you deal with it not about the people around you thinking how you should be.
I know that...

...jeez, I'm in the middle of a metaphysical debate and this is what's stumped me. I feel like I'm looking at a blank Rubik's Cube, numerous possibilities, but fundamentally unsolvable.



Perhaps I've been fooled and there is no solution.



The solution is to PAINT the Rubik's Cube. Paint it like it's solved.



I have a buying addiction and it's getting really out of hand. My anxiety is through the roof lately, for multiple reasons, but a big one is this problem I have with spending money. I'm feeling really depressed at times too the past few weeks (tonight is the worst bout of depression and anxiety I've had in some time), which is unusual for me - I'm usually very happy. I think the buying addiction is one the causes. I mean, I've kind of been addicted to spending for a while, but I feel it's getting particularly out of hand and I'm just getting sick of it. I'm going to see a therapist in hopes he can direct me on how to get over this. I think part of the anxiety comes from the fact that in truth, I really want to work on savings and finances. I hate being broke all the time. But I'm always thinking about that next item I "need," which in most cases, I don't actually need.

I just wanted to share, but I'm also looking for tips on how to overcome this. Has anyone else dealt with this in the extreme? How did you get over it?



What kind of stuff are you "needing"?


Is it movie stuff or like, just general crap?
Lots of stuff movie and music related. I "need" new equipment, new instruments, new music, new blu-rays. But then it extends to stuff like food. I have an eating addiction too, so mix that with the spending thing, I'm always going out to get food.