Clash of the Titans
(2010)
Close your freaking eyes when fighting the Medusa. It's as simple as that. If the characters can't even figure out a simple logic like that, you know the movie is dumb and shouldn't be taken seriously.
Clash of the Titans could have been so much fun. It's got good-looking special effects that would surely get kids interested in Greek mythologies the way
Jurassic Park got me into dinosaurs. It's got believable and decent acting by Liam Neeson and Sam Worthington (trust me, those can be hard to find in a dumb movie; just look at some of Wolfgang Petersen's films). There's a promising sub-plot about man's rebellion against the gods. These are obviously not your Disney Greek gods, not even the nicer ones from Percy Jackson.
Unfortunately, that interesting sub-plot was undermined by a trite coming of age adventure involving a poor man's version of that 'Fellowship' band of heroes from a more popular medieval movie (about a ring, if you need further clues). I only remembered Nicholas Hoult as Eusebios among those soldiers because, well,
X-Men.
Even though nothing in the movie is as epic as what the actually epic trailer tried to make it look like, I had fun, somewhat. The fight against the Kraken was rather short though (never mind the inaccurate depiction of the monster), and I wish Perseus would remain loyal to mankind and kick Zeus' ass or something. That would have made a more entertaining movie. I mean, really, you have this wonderful character who represents man's rebellion against the gods, and you turn it into a family-friendly ending where father and son reunites with big smiles.
When you say "Clash of the Titans", I was expecting more 'clash' to it, like maybe Kronos giving Prometheus a sock in the face or something. As it is now, you only have maybe one good battle against the scorpions, a semi-good (but totally dumb) battle against Medusa, the Djinn who didn't pull enough rabbits outta their hats for the kids, some lame Stygian Witches who are practically old women, Calibos the Forgettable, and a lackluster Kraken appearance. Not exactly 'titanic', is it?
Note that I have no prior knowledge or allegiance towards the original film this was remade from, so I saw it as a standalone film in terms of its quality.
(Meh)
Enjoyability: (More Greek mythological monsters fighting each other please)