JayDee's Movie Musings

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Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
Well there's another superhero flick out at the cinema right now and you know what that means ladies and gentlemen. That's right, it's time for another of my famous (or is that infamous?) fanboy ramblings



mittor
mirror

Year of release
2013

Directed by
Alan Taylor

Written by
Christopher Yost
Christopher Markus
Stephen McFeely

Starring
Chris Hemsworth
Natalie Portman
Tom Hiddleston
Stellan Skarsgård
Christopher Eccleston
Anthony Hopkins

Thor: The Dark World

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Plot – Following the battle of New York (as seen in The Avengers) the God of Thunder Thor (Hemsworth) has managed to bring peace to the nine realms. The bifrost has been repaired and his brother Loki (Hiddleston) has been imprisoned in the cells of Asgard. This newfound peace is threatened however by the return of an old Asgardian foe thought lost to time; the Dark Elves who are led by the villainous Malekith (Eccleston). They have been awakened by the return of the Aether; a powerful weapon which has inhabited Thor's love interest Jane Foster (Portman). Upon discovery of this Thor brings Jane to Asgard against the wishes of his father Odin (Hopkins). Her presence in Asgard attracts the forces of the Dark Elves who launch an all-out assault on Asgard in a bid to gain control of the Aether and bring destruction to all of the nine realms. Thor is not about to sit back and allow this to happen however, even if it means enlisting the aid of his wayward brother.

As is always the case when it comes to superhero flicks I feel that I should post some kind of disclaimer. The fact is that I love superheroes. Just absolutely love them! That's true whether it's on the pages of comic books or up on the big screen. So that makes me a very easy target for films like this. It's like honeykid and the films of Drew Barrymore. Just the fact that she's in the film gives it a leg up on the competition before the film has even started. And as such that perhaps means that my opinion of such films should be taken with a pinch of salt. Unless I don't like them. If even I don't like a certain superhero film then you know it's got to be bad! Thankfully I didn't find that to be the case with Thor: The Dark World.

When it was announced that Alan Taylor was going to be replacing Kenneth Branagh in the director's chair for Thor: The Dark World it was an announcement that generated a certain expectation amongst fans of the mighty bearded one. Given the time that Taylor's spent in Westeros on Game of Thrones (he helmed six episodes over the first two seasons) it was thought that he would take Thor and his fellow Asgardians in a slightly darker direction than his predecessor. And while there may be a touch of that at work here, the more pertinent comparison would actually be to the Lord of the Rings films. In fact during the film's opening stages you'd be forgiven for thinking that Peter Jackson's latest jaunt to Middle-Earth had been released ahead of schedule. The film opens with an epic, exposition-heavy prologue that feels like it has been transposed in its entirety from The Fellowship of the Ring. We get a large scale battle between the forces of Asgard and the Dark Elves led by Malekith, as Anthony Hopkins delivers a grandiose voice-over explaining the history between the two forces. At times The Dark World's score, created by Brian Tyler, also resembles very strongly the grand and heroic work that Alan Shore contributed to the Lord of the Rings series. Hell even the Dark Elves bear quite the resemblance to the goblins of Middle Earth when they don their war masks. Alongside the Lord of the Rings feel the other touch-point would probably by John Carter or the original Star Wars trilogy due to The Dark World's rather fun, pulpy vibe.

The big question that always comes up in relation to sequels, particularly those of a superheroic nature is, “how does it compare to the original?” I was a big fan of the first Thor film and I've got to say that it's really tough to say at the moment, it's quite the neck and neck competition. If I was pushed I would perhaps just give the edge to the first film. I felt that it was just a touch more focused in its approach, having Thor stripped of his power and his standing on Asgard and giving him the goal of proving himself worthy again. The story here is a little more scatterbrained, with the Malekith strand of the plot being very simplistic and a major contrivance required to force Portman's Jane Foster into the proceedings. The script could certainly have done with an extra polish or two to iron out its problems. Though the one area where I will give the script credit is in its humour quotient. The Dark World turns out to be funnier than most comedies I've seen in recent years. Early on it's largely down to the delightful Kat Dennings to provide the laughs, though she gets some assistance from the returning Stellan Skarsgård and the addition of Chris O'Dowd. After that the laughs are generated by some witty sight gags and verbal jabs and one-liners from Hiddlestone's Loki. There is also a brilliant cameo which comes as a delightfully unexpected surprise, and I'm not talking about Stan Lee.

Film Trivia Snippets - Originally considered for the role of Malekith was Mads Mikkelsen, but he had to drop out of contention due to scheduling conflicts with his TV show, Hannibal. /// Thor: The Dark World was shot in England under the title of “Thursday Morning.” In Norse mythology, the day Thursday was named after the god Thor (Thursday = Thor's Day) /// In total there were about 30 versions of Mjolnir created for filming. The hammers were made of various weights for different users and situations. The main hammer was made from aluminum but was replicated in various materials and weight, including a 'soft' version for stunts Of the 30 hammers, five versions were used most often, including a 'lit hammer' that emits light to create lightning strikes. /// To represent Svartalfheim, the realm of the Dark Elves, the filmmakers chose to film in Iceland due to its black volcanic landscapes. The name itself, Svartalfheim, literally means 'Black Elf World' in the Old Norse/Icelandic language. /// Thor: The Dark World was originally set to be directed by Patty Jenkins but she left the production in December of 2011 due to “creative differences.” Natalie Portman was apparently so upset at this turn of events that she initially refused to return for the sequel, only doing so when she was forced due to her contract.
The Dark World may be extremely similar to its predecessor in many ways but there is the odd difference here and there. This time out I imagine that the city of Asgard is a more fleshed-out place presented on a grander scale, with a more lived in feel and more hustle and bustle about the place. It also remains a terrifically realised world thanks to some truly excellent CGI. One major difference I felt was that the Shakespearean vibe that was so present in the dialogue of the original has been significantly toned down here, particularly in regards to Hopkins' Odin.

Without a doubt the biggest flaw of the script and the biggest weakness of the film in general however can be found in its villain. Christopher Ecclestone's Malekith comes up very short in that regard. Visually Malekith and his fellow elves are a very striking creation but he is just such a thinly sketched character; we never get to really know who he is or what the motivation is behind his plans. He feels very much like your bog standard Bond villain, but instead of wanting to destroy the world he wants to take out the entire universe and all of the nine realms encompassed within it. I can't lay any of the blame at Eccleston's door however. He is just never given any opportunity to fulfil the potential that his casting created. And as such he is greatly upstaged by Hiddleston's Loki. In fact if anything it is Malekith's henchman Kurse who makes a bigger impact following his transformation into a devilish creature seemingly comprised of rock and lava. It's not often that I say this in regards to modern films, but if anything The Dark World could have done with having a bit of a longer running time. This is now the 8th film that has been released from the Marvel Studios stable and is actually the shortest of the lot. Considering how quickly the film breezes along I don't think another 20 or 30 minutes would really have hurt the pace, and it could perhaps have allowed them more time to flesh out the character of Malekith, the romance between Thor and Jane and just the story in general.

The massive slew of superhero films to have hit cinema screens this century, alongside the likes of the Transformers series, has seen a bit of fatigue set in amongst audiences and critics when it comes to the huge action scenes at the conclusion of these films. Quite often they have been accused of being nothing but loud, mindless smackdowns that pit two almost invincible forces against each other and usually result in city-wide destruction; it was a complaint I saw frequently levelled at the finale to Man of Steel. While The Dark World does feature this to a degree it is able to avoid falling into a similar trap thanks to some invention in the script and Alan Taylor skilfully juggling the contrasting tones. The finale sees Thor and Malekith beating seven shades of s*it out of each other throughout Greenwich in London, but the addition of unstable portals capable of transporting the characters to different points in London and even to different worlds adds a new wrinkle to the big superhero beat-em-up, and makes it a very fresh and interesting set-piece. Somewhat surprisingly it is also during the fight that we get some of the biggest laughs that the film has to offer. It's a somewhat bold and risky move to include so much humour in a sequence that is concerning itself with the potential destruction of the nine realms and the deaths of countless trillions of people; you could very easily undermine the drama of it and have the whole thing flop horribly. So congratulations are in order for Taylor and how he manages to balance the large-scale destruction and the rich vein of humour. The CGI during the big finale and throughout the whole film in fact is absolutely fantastic.

Film Trivia Snippets - In the original Thor film Zachary Levi was due to play the part of Fandral, one of the Warriors Three, but had to drop out because of commitments to his TV show Chuck. The role was taken on by Josh Dallas who was due to return as Fandral in The Dark World. This time however it was his TV commitments to Once Upon a Time that meant he had to drop out. So Zachary Levi was finally given his shot at the character second time around. /// Thor: The Dark World was really quite the collaborative effort between the men who have been tasked with bringing Marvel's characters to the big screen. Joss Whedon, who wrote and directed The Avengers, was brought in to rewrite several scenes in the script. While James Gunn, the director of the forthcoming Guardians of the Galaxy, actually directed the first of the film's post credit scenes. /// The film proved to be a very dangerous venture for Jaimie Alexander, the actress who portrays Sif. While filming in London she suffered a series of injuries; "It was raining, it was dark outside, it was like 5 in the morning - and I went down a metal staircase and slipped and slipped a disc in my thoracic spine and chipped 11 of my vertebrae. I knocked my left shoulder out of place and tore my rhomboid on my right side... It took me out of filming for a month!" /// Filming at the famous Stonehenge historical site proved to be a challenge. After finally getting permission from English Heritage, the filmmakers found out that there were lots of rules and regulations associated with filming there. They could only be in amongst the stones outside of the normal visiting hours. So shooting had to take place early in the morning before opening, which only gave the film crew about three hours before they had to pull back for wider shots once the stones were opened to the public. Being a heritage site, no one was allowed to touch the stones or walk on any stones, so a lot of logistics had to be applied to the filming there.
Even if no-one is going to be picking up any awards for their performances The Dark World is a nicely acted effort from all involved. While the role of the big, blonde warrior who smashes things up with a hammer doesn't exactly give Hemsworth much opportunity to build his character he continues to prove a fine fit for the role; he certainly looks the part of a God, does his best to bring a grandiose nature to his performance and keeps some of the character's arrogance from the first film but tempers it with his new-found nobility, wisdom and maturity. The role of Thor could easily have become a bit of a joke, with it becoming a bit of Razzie magnet for the man who stepped into the Asgardian's shoes, but Hemsworth has admirably made the role his own now. As his earthbound love Natalie Portman does a decent job with what she is given but it really isn't a lot. She really is just relying heavily on her natural charm (of which she thankfully has a plentiful amount of) to make an impact here, though her beauty does at least make it feasible that she could tempt a God. There really is very little progress or development made in regards to their romance; at one point we see Jane willing to sacrifice her life for Thor and I don't feel that we've really seen why she would do this. Other than his big muscles of course! The script also misses the opportunity to really do much with her once she has been transported to Asgard; it doesn't really build the relationship or even utilise her situation for some fish-out-of-water comedy in the same fashion as the first film did with Thor on Earth. While her role is still pretty small Kat Dennings is given more scope to make an impact, and proves to be both an adorable and very funny presence. The role of Heimdall is also expanded slightly from his first outing and Edris Elba does his best to make the most of it. Anthony Hopkins is decent enough as Odin but there's certainly a growing feeling that he is rather phoning in his performance.

Without a doubt however it is Tom Hiddleston who remains the undisputed star of these adventures as Thor's nefarious brother Loki. He is just fantastic in the role, confirming himself once again as one of the best villains to have so far graced the world of superhero films. Hiddleston just nails every single aspect of the character whether it be his childish petulance, his nefarious scheming and glib one-liners or his more emotional, conflicted side. He really is an extremely complex and fascinating character, so much so that I'd love to see him get his own spin-off film even though it's not really possible. Great credit has to go to Hiddleston for making sure that even in this, his third outing, no character fatigue has yet to set in with Loki. And thanks to his performance it is the Thor-Loki dynamic which remains the most interesting and entertaining facet of the film. Even though they take it to potentially world-destroying levels their relationship is one that is still so brotherly, with Loki constantly prodding and provoking his older brother. Forcing the two into a uneasy alliance as reluctant allies against Malekith makes for some very entertaining sequences between the two.

And as is tradition with Marvel's output be sure to stick around for not one, but two coda scenes. The first occurs very quickly after the credits have started to roll and acts as a little teaser for future developments in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, kick-starting a story which will apparently be picked up in both next year's Guardians of the Galaxy and perhaps even the third Avengers film. Apparently Guardians is going to be quite out there and if this is any indicator then that certainly will be the case. The second scene appears right at the end of the credits and while not as vital it is good fun. It delivers a nice moment between Thor and Jane and then sends us out on another touch of humour.

Conclusion - Going into this my expectations were pretty huge. After the fun first film and the tremendous double punch of The Avengers and Iron Man 3 my hopes were high, and had only been buoyed by the promising trailers and TV spots. I thought this could have been one of the real greats of the genre. While it didn't hit those heights, Thor: The Dark World is another highly entertaining addition to the Marvel Cinematic Universe and proves once again why Marvel are the current champs when it comes to the creation of the big blockbuster. I will say that I am perhaps being a touch generous as it is flawed, largely as a result of it's script problems but I still found it a blast. Now roll on Captain America: The Winter Soldier (April 4th, 2014) and Guardians of the Galaxy (August 1st, 2014)





Took the words out of my mouth on so many points with this review.

First off I really feel Anthony Hopkins is phoning in the role. There is one part toward the 2nd act (I think you know what part) where I would expect a massive emotional response from him, but instead I get the same response he gives from the rest of the movie.

Second, Hiddleston is in full form. I think he really loves the character, so much so that he dressed up as the character for Comic-Con, and you can see him in commercials on Comedy Central doing a funny parody of the AT&T commercials with the group of kids. So I think we will see this type of performance as Loki for a long while. And with him on screen, he really does over shadow the Dark Elves, and he was a side character in the damn movie!

I also agree that the humor in these movies out do A LOT of the crap cookie cutter comedies being peddled today. Now occasionally we get a movie like Ted, or something original like This is the End, but Marvel has hit that perfect blend of high power action and tongue and cheek humor. Something I am a big fan of. And the two cameos, one by Stan Lee and... the other cameo where hilarious!

I am so looking forward to the next two Marvel Studios Features, bring on Captain America and the Guardians of the Galaxy!



Chappie doesn't like the real world
Won't read your Thor review because I haven't seen it, but I 'll try to remember to get back once I have. I really liked the first one and was surprised by to what degree I did. It's definitely in my top ten super hero movies and maybe in the top five. Hopefully, this one is comparable to the quality of the first. Looking forward to seeing it.



Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
After a few reviews that jumped the queue either because they were synonymous with Halloween (Poltergeist, The Mist) or currently in cinemas (Thor) we return to the backlog. And following my review of Big it's time for another old favourite I'm revisiting as I continue my never-ending work on my new favourite films list. While Big proved very popular this is a much lesser known film, a really small independent film. In fact I'll be surprised if anyone else has even seen it.


mirror
mirror


Year of release
1980

Directed by
Irvin Kershner

Written by
Lawrence Kasdan
Leigh Brackett

Starring
Mark Hamill
Harrison Ford
Carrie Fisher
Billy Dee Williams
Anthony Daniels
Frank Oz

Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back

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Plot - After receiving a vision from Obi-Wan Kenobi and fleeing the ice world of Hoth with his friends after an Imperial attack, Luke Skywalker travels to the marsh planet of Dagobah, where he is instructed in the ways of the Force by the legendary Jedi Master Yoda. Meanwhile, Han Solo and Princess Leia make their way to planet Bespin, where they are greeted by Han's old friend, a shifty gambler named Lando Calrissian. Ambushed by the Empire shortly after their arrival, Han and his friends are imprisoned by Darth Vader. Luke leaves Dagobah to rescue his friends, and is met by Vader and a startling revelation.

Unlike the large majority of people on here I'm guessing, I didn't grow up on the Star Wars films. In fact the first film of the series that I ever saw was The Phantom Menace, and that didn't exactly make me desperate to track down the rest. As a result it wasn't until just a few years ago that I finally got round to watching the original trilogy. And while I like both Star Wars and Return of the Jedi, for me Empire Strikes Back is just on a completely different level from them. The film features so many of the series' best and most iconic moments and scenes, as well as introducing a couple of much loved characters. I mean you've got Luke's encounter with the wampa, the AT-ATs attack on the rebel base on Hoth, Han being frozen in carbonite, Luke's training under the tutelage of Yoda - and that's only the tip of the iceberg! You've also got the epic lightsaber battle between Luke and Vader, the best of the series. Set in the bowels of Cloud City it has the appearance of taking place in the depths of hell itself. Shrouded in darkness, lit by eerie, red mood lighting and buffeted by pillows of smoke and steam it makes for a wonderfully evocative backdrop for this collision between the two characters. A collision which of course culminates in the film's most famous moment, indeed it's one of the most famous moments in the history of cinema. And despite the fact that it is now one of the most known movie twists of all time, and the one of the most parodied scenes ever the moment still retains a real pop to it.

And then there are the characters that are introduced. To lesser extents you've got Billy Dee Williams' Lando Calrissian, and the bounty hunter Bobba Fett. Although I've got to say that I'm rather baffled by the huge cult following that Fett has assembled. Yes he's got quite a cool outfit and an air of mystery but not much else. However every character introduction pales in comparison to that of the little green, pint-sized Jedi master that was Yoda. I love the façade that Yoda puts on during his initial meeting with Luke. The first impression is that he's a goofy, idiotic little bundle of energy. He kind of reminds me of Daffy, the exceptionally silly mogwai from Gremlins: The New Batch. And had he carried on this vein perhaps he would have inherited the mantle of most annoying Star Wars character long before Jar-Jar Binks was even conceived of. Afterwards however he reveals his true nature and the great wisdom that he holds within his tiny little frame. He's a great character and a wonderful little addition to the Star Wars universe. It actually feels like a bit of a risk on behalf of the filmmakers giving such prominence to a puppet, something that you imagine could easily have flopped. The character plays such a vital role in the film that had it failed the whole movie could easily have fallen down around it. So much of the character's success though is down to the legend that is Frank Oz who does an immense job at both puppeteering and voicing Yoda, with Oz himself responsible for generating the character's iconic syntax.

Film Trivia Snippets - George Lucas originally offered the role of Yoda to his friend Jim Henson. Even though he turned it down, Henson did suggest that Lucas give the job to Frank Oz. It worked out so well and Lucas was so impressed by Oz's performance that he spent thousands of dollars on an advertising campaign to try and get OZ an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor. The campaign ultimately failed however because it was felt that a puppeteer was not a 'proper' actor. /// If you look closely during the asteroid sequence, you'll be able to see that not all of the asteroids are actual asteroids. One of them is potato and another is actually a shoe. The rumour in regards to the latter is that George Lucas asked the SFX people to redo the scene so many times that their annoyance eventually got the best of them and one of the artists threw their own shoe into the scene. /// Part of the reason to have Han Solo frozen in carbonite at the end of Empire was down to the uncertainty over whether Harrison Ford would return for the third film or not. Back when the original Star Wars was being made Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamill signed three picture deals, but Ford refused. He even requested that Lucas kill off Solo as he felt his character had fulfilled his usefulness; a request that Lucas refused as he still had a heroic part for Han Solo to play in Return of the Jedi.
The
Empire Strikes Back zips along at a really quite tremendous rate with barely a moment's rest in between the lightsaber cobmat, space battles, Han and Leia on the run etc. And it obviously starts off as every Star Wars film did with the opening crawl of information which provides a massive exposition dump and allows the film to just jump right into the action. One of the reasons that I find this is a much richer film than A New Hope is down to the fact that it has the villains on top, something which proves to be just much more interesting. And while this may ensure that the film is certainly darker and with a bit more grit about it than either the preceding Star Wars or the following Return of the Jedi, surprisingly it's perhaps also funnier than either of those films. This is largely down to C3PO's involvement. This time out they seem to have really upped his level of crankiness and introduced quite a degree of disdain for the android on the part of Han Solo which was entertaining. And I love how peeved he is once he's been disassembled and then reassembled with his head on the wrong way. Though he's not the only source for humour, Yoda too also joins in when it comes to delivering the laughs.

Even though his character became one of the most famous fictional creations of all time, I wouldn't say that Mark Hamill exactly gives an excellent performance as Luke Skywalker. I find him to be really quite wooden and awkward, however in an odd way that works. It helps to convince us of the character's wide-eyed naivety and 'aw shucks' nature. His deer caught in the headlights expression works for this young kid thrust into such an insane, daunting situation. A stronger performance can be found in the presence of Harrison Ford as Han Solo, playing him with a great charisma and arrogance. Ford also gets to really play with the sexual chemistry and level of bickering between himself and Carrie Fisher's Leia which is amped up in this instalment. In fact all of the characters are better handled and developed in this film. If you really wanted to criticise Star Wars you could perhaps look at the characters. In it Luke was a bit of a whiny bitch, Han a narcissistic mercenary and Leia reduced to a damsel in distress. Here in Empire however they all grow and develop to a stage where they can save the day in the concluding Return of the Jedi. Luke grows up and becomes the leader of the Rebel Alliance, Han develops into a noble hero and Leia becomes quite the kick-ass heroine who can hold her own in any situation. The only real disappointment in regards to the cast, and one of the very few areas I'd give Star Wars the upper hand, is the real lack of Alec Guinness who brought such great gravitas to the role of Obi Wan Kenobi.

In terms of the characters the Star Wars films actually act like a series of classic double acts. To start with you've got the master/student relationship between Luke and Obi-Wan, the classic buddy relationship between Han and Chewbacca and the odd-couple like pairing between R2-D2 and C3PO. That last one in particular is a lot of fun as we watch them squabble and antagonise each other, even if we understand only what one of them is saying. I love the contrast in their designs which highlights the polar opposites of robot design ever since they were first conceived. You've got the completely robotic piece of machinery that is R2-D2 coupled with the android C3PO, an attempt to mimic as closely as possible the appearance of a human being. Once these three disparate groups come together they then break off into other double acts such as the bickering/sexual chemistry/innuendo relationship of Han and Leia

Film Trivia Snippets - Even though The Empire Strikes Back is generally regarded as the darkest entry in the Star Wars series, with just 30 deaths it actually has the lowest body count of any film in the saga. /// Early on in the film's production Paul Verhoeven was one of the men in line to direct it, based on his work on Soldier of Orange. When he was invited to a meeting with the producers he took along a copy of his newest film, Spetters, to screen for them. After that screening he never heard from them again. /// Before Star Wars had even been released, Mark Hammill was nearly killed in an automobile accident and as a result, had to have reconstructive surgery on his face. George Lucas used the Wampa attack to explain Luke's altered appearance. When Hamill asked Lucas what he would have done if Hamill had been killed in the accident, Lucas told him that he would not have recast the part of Luke. Instead, a new character would have been introduced that would be linked genetically, in some way, to Luke. This link would also explain the new character's strength in the Force
And when talking about the Star Wars films it would be impossible (or at least it should be) to overlook the massive contribution made by John William's highly celebrated score. It carries on the great work laid out in Star Wars but also builds on it by introducing probably the most famous piece of music from the series, and one of the most recognised in all of cinematic history; The Imperial March. As soon as it kicks in (“dun dun da-dun, dun dun da-dun”) you just get shivers down your spine, such an ominous and brilliant piece of music. It would come to be simply known by the shorthand of Darth Vader's theme, and that theme, just as much as anything else, really goes to creating and defining the character of Vader. Watching him stride through the Death Star just wouldn't be the same without that theme at his back. Speaking of good old Darth it's in this sequel that he is really allowed to grow into one of the all time great movie villains. In Star Wars he was working in co-operation with Grand Moff Tarkin and felt kind of like his henchman, while in Return of the Jedi we see him in reverence to Emperor Palpatine. With Empire however this is Darth's show. The character is unleashed and given free reign to dominate proceedings. And what a character he is. To be honest it's actually achieved in quite simple terms but it's just done so damn well. Alongside the aforementioned musical cues you've got the outfit, the helmet and the voice. Oh yes, that voice! Oh what a voice. What a tremendous and inspired casting decision it was to bring in James Earl Jones to provide the foreboding ones of Vader. A voice that just carries so much weight and authority. When that man is saying something, you make damn sure that you're listening.

It's not just in the creation of Vader that a lot of creativity can be found. Some of the art design in Empire and indeed throughout all of the original trilogy is fantastic. The costume design for Vader and the Stormtroopers is excellent and truly iconic, while as I said earlier the design of the little android duo is likewise stellar. A lot of impressive work also went in to creating the wider world of weaponry, ships, locations etc. The only slight let-down is perhaps the apparel of the human characters outwith the Empire. That aside though the film is a credit to the craft and ability of all those involved with costuming the characters, building the sets, giving life to all the puppets etc. There is a lot of fine craftsmanship on show here. And a whole load of fun.

Conclusion - The Empire Strikes Back is just a terrifically entertaining and rollicking slice of space-faring adventure. I've attempted to point out some of the reasons why I see this as being the absolute pinnacle of George Lucas' creation, but perhaps the most impressive aspect of all this success is that it all comes about despite being the second movie in a trilogy. So often the middle movie of a series suffers just because its very nature dictates that nothing is really going to be resolved, that it's going to end on a bit of a cliffhanger. Empire is so good however that is able to sidestep even this problem. Had I seen these films as a kid and really grown up with them I could see myself loving this even more than I do.



We've gone on holiday by mistake
Great to see my fav film ever being reviewed by you Jaydee. Really enjoyed reading it.

Early on in the film's production Paul Verhoeven was one of the men in line to direct it
Damn imagine the little TV snippets of Empire propaganda we would have seen like in Robocop/Starship Troopers.

The film is just perfection from beginning to end and it's great to see the bad guys on top for a change, and for the whole film no less. The Yoda scenes are just legendary, especially the X Wing scene.

"I...I don't believe it,"

"That is why you fail"



Now were talking. I have always had a soft spot for Return, because of it being the only one I got to see in its original theatrical release and started my love for this universe. In my adult years I have learned to hold Empire in higher esteem, although I don't say anything negative about the original trilogy anyway. Seeing Empire on the big screen when the special editions were released is one of my most memorable theater experiences ever. Cloud City in particular took on a whole new life for me seeing it on the big screen for the first time. So many favorite moments from this one: Luke against the Wampa, the AT-AT walkers- I especially love Luke bringing down one on foot, everything on Cloud City is awesome, and some of my favorite Vader moments from any of the films.

I enjoyed your review very much. I literally laughed out loud when you referred to Luke as a whiny bitch because that is exactly what he is through the first two films. Feel free to create a Star Wars graphic for me to use in your review thread.
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Letterboxd





Empire is an easy top 50 favorite movie and a favorite from my childhood. I was shocked to read that you did not grow up with this series as a kid. Absolutely blew my mind since I thought this was standard fare for kids!



Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
Great to see my fav film ever being reviewed by you Jaydee. Really enjoyed reading it.

Damn imagine the little TV snippets of Empire propaganda we would have seen like in Robocop/Starship Troopers.
Glad to have pleased you gandalf.

And while it's hard to imagine how he could have improved the film I'd loved to have seen what Verhoeven could have come up with.

I have always had a soft spot for Return, because of it being the only one I got to see in its original theatrical release and started my love for this universe.

I enjoyed your review very much. I literally laughed out loud when you referred to Luke as a whiny bitch because that is exactly what he is through the first two films. Feel free to create a Star Wars graphic for me to use in your review thread.
Perhaps I shouldn't say this as it may start a backlash but Return of the Jedi is actually my second favourite of the Star Wars films. And as I'm sure the more intelligent of you will already have worked out, that means that for me Star Wars (or A New Hope as Lucas would have it) is actually my least favourite of the original trilogy. I think that's because while I really enjoy the films I don't have a deep love for the world and its characters the way I do other films (Lord of the Rings, Back to the Future etc). So even though the first may be 'better' than Jedi with more characterisation, character moments, plot etc I just find Jedi more fun and purely entertaining.

Thank you. And he really was! The bit in A New Hope where his dad tells him to clean up the droids and he whines about wanting to meet up with his friends! Such a brat! Oh and back on Page 63 when I was making my silly pics I did actually do a couple of Star Wars ones. Though I didn't go down the obvious Yoda "A great review this is" route.

I was shocked to read that you did not grow up with this series as a kid. Absolutely blew my mind since I thought this was standard fare for kids!
Yeah I can see why it's a surprise. I think there's a few reasons why. One is that my mum (who introduced me to a number of films as a kid) wasn't a fan of Star Wars so she didn't introduce me to them and it also bred a sort of dislike on my behalf before I'd even seen them. Then I think there's also perhaps the 'Yankees factor.' If you're not a fan of a team, a film, a band etc that is beloved and critically adored then you go the complete opposite way and reject them.



Yeah I can see why it's a surprise. I think there's a few reasons why. One is that my mum (who introduced me to a number of films as a kid) wasn't a fan of Star Wars so she didn't introduce me to them and it also bred a sort of dislike on my behalf before I'd even seen them. Then I think there's also perhaps the 'Yankees factor.' If you're not a fan of a team, a film, a band etc that is beloved and critically adored then you go the complete opposite way and reject them.
Yeah I can see that.



Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
Well after recently revisiting the original Star Wars trilogy and writing a review for The Empire Strikes Back I felt I was about time that I finally subjected myself to the prequels. It wasn't a pretty picture


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Year of release
1999

Directed by
George Lucas

Written by
George Lucas

Starring
Liam Neeson
Ewan McGregor
Natalie Portman
Jake Lloyd
Ian McDiarmid
Pernilla August


Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace


Plot - The film begins as two Jedi, assigned as ambassadors to resolve a trade dispute, arrive in orbit of the threatened planet Naboo. When the situation turns violent, the Jedi, along with PadmeAmidala (Portman), the planet's queen, flee Naboo in an attempt to reach the capital world of the Galactic Republic, Coruscant. There they hope to find a peaceful and diplomatic end to the dispute. Along the way, the ship must stop for repairs on the planet Tatooine. It is there that the Jedi encounter Anakin Skywalker (Lloyd), a young slave boy who is unusually strong with the Force. When the group returns to Naboo, they realize that the situation is much worse than they had at first thought: the evil Sith, ancient enemies of the Jedi, have returned

I don't know what George Lucas' home life is like, the kind of relationship he has with his kids etc, but I'm just going to posit a theory. Had his family wanted to have George sanctioned as mentally incompetent and gain control of his fortune, then The Phantom Menace would surely have been Exhibit A in the trial. What an absolutely woeful, ill-conceived mess it is; full of brutal dialogue, clumsy direction and some story decisions that truly boggle the mind. With Lucas having now relinquished the reins to the Star Wars franchise, you might understand someone else making such bold, sweeping changes to the series' mythology but from the man who created it himself? It's not often you see someone s*it all over their own creation, but here is perhaps the best example you are ever going to see. In fact I'm just surprised that this isn't The Phantom Menace - A film by Alan Smithee. You would imagine that surely once it had been completed Lucas would identify what a complete atrocity it was and attempt to distance himself from it as far as possible.

“A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. Turmoil has engulfed the Galactic Republic. The taxation of trade routes to outlying star systems is in dispute. Hoping to resolve”....... zzzzzz.....zzzzzz......zzzzzzz. Oh god I'm already bored! Even if you were to completely ignore the original trilogy and the expectation of thrills that they brought, how can you possibly make a film with the wonderfully evocative title of Star Wars and all that hints at, and yet deliver something so mind-numbingly boring! Though at least that opening crawls provides a warning of what you're in for. What we basically have is a film whose main issues are trade unions, taxes and picket lines. Just because you place the proceedings in space doesn't do anything to raise the level of interest. Watching a series of characters going over these issues again and again makes for a bit of a snoozefest. And even the breaks away from these discussions rarely do anything to raise the level of excitement. When we make it on to Tattooine the film seems to forget that it's a space flick. It feels like we are marooned there for an absolute age as the film gets completely bogged down; the storyline of having to get parts for their ship isn't exactly a thrillride and feels more like a short mission objective from a video game. During this stretch the film should also drop the title of The Phantom Menace and just rename itself Herbie Goes to Tatooine as it really does dedicate itself fully to the pod race. It does actually provide one of the film's rare moments of interest however, with the pod race and its visuals receiving a thumbs up. They are however hurt by the frequent, supposedly hilarious interruptions of the race's colour commentators.

I can avoid the elephant in the room no longer. Jar Jar MOTHERF*CKING Binks!!!!! While I've occasionally invoked the name of old Jar Jar on here in a very negative light, to be honest I didn't really remember my experience of him. I was just going along with the crowd. While I have seen the film before it was some 14 years ago and I remembered absolutely nothing about it, Jar Jar included. And I've got to he honest, I didn't think he could really be that bad. Surely the amount of hate and derision that is thrown at him had to be over-the-top and unjustified. Right? Well no, the character somehow managed to live up to the 'hype.' Not just the worst thing in the world of Star Wars, but one of the worst things I've ever seen inflicted on any film ever. How could Lucas possibly have envisaged him as being a good idea. His goofy, clumsy character is laughably bad while his dialogue is truly brutal, all topped off by the fact that he comes across as pretty damn racist. I can only imagine that it was written by a five-year-old child. That certainly seems to be the only intended audience for the character. Just cringeworthy. And the really bad news? There's a whole race of the damn things!!! Even on visual terms he's quite the flop, looking like something more at home in a Playstation game than a major movie. And I'm not talking PS3. Or even PS2. I'm talking about the old-ass, retro original Playstation. Jar Jar's movements are particularly bad, the character seemingly having no weight or grounding at all as he just bobs along on the surface, at no point coming across as anything close to convincing. He does work in one single respect however. He made sure that I kept watching the film, that I couldn't turn it off. Though not in the fashion I'm sure Lucas was aiming for. The character was so awful that it created a car crash-like situation. It was such a disaster that I couldn't take my eyes off him. It was like peering at a horrible pile-up in a macabre nature, checking to see if you can spot a decapitated head.

Though it's not just with Jar Jar that Lucas reveals his agenda to make a goofier, more childish film. So many of the characters are just silly little creations with goofy voices, whether it be the amphibian faced neimoidians, Sebulba or the droids. Speaking of which I would say that the droids make for a really poor man's stormtrooper, but that would be an insult to poor men the world over. Though I've got to admit that during their big battle with Jar-Jar and his fellow Gungas my allegiances did actually lie with the droids. I let out a little cheer every single time one of those damned Gungas went down for the count.

I've seen and heard people that grew up on the original Star Wars trilogy say that with this movie George Lucas raped their childhood. I had always assumed they were being absolutely ridiculous. While it may remain a rather tasteless remark I can now see where they are coming from. I cannot imagine how disappointing this would have been to people who grew up on Star Wars. After waiting for 22 years this is the best Lucas could do? I'm aware that some of the truly die-hard fans queued for days so that they could be amongst the first to see the film. The disappointment and pain they felt must have been extraordinary. It can not have been anywhere near as good as they were hoping for, as bad as they perhaps feared it would be and even worse than they could possibly have imagined. Being a geek has become rather fashionable these days, what with geek chic and all that. This is the kind of film however that makes you embarrassed to be a geek. Had I seen this at the cinema I'd have slumping further and further down in my seat in an an attempt to hide and I'd have tried to sneak out of the cinema unseen afterwards. I think I'd be less self conscious walking into my local store and buying a whole stash of hardcore pornography.

Film Trivia Snippets - He may have become one of the most iconic elements of all the prequles, but Darth Maul only speaks a total of three lines throughout the whole film. In fact Benicio Del Toro was originally set to play Darth Maul but left the film after George Lucas removed most of the character's dialogue. /// Sets for Phantom Meance were only built as high as the top of the actors heads, with CGI creating everything above and beyond that. Liam Neeson is so tall however that sets where he would feature had to be built to a higher level, costing the set crew an extra $150,000 in construction. /// While filming scenes in which he was involved in lightsaber duels, Ewan McGregor actually made his own lightsaber noises. It was noted and corrected during post production. /// When Fox released the first trailer they did so with strict instructions that it not be shown before a certain date. When a Canadian movie theatre accidentally showed it a day early, they lost the rights to show the movie. Harsh! And during the first week of the first trailer's release, many theatres reported that up to 75% of their audiences that had paid full price for a movie, then walked out after the Star Wars: Episode I trailer had been shown. /// Even though she had been around for a few years now Natalie Portman was still very young. So young in fact that she had to miss the film's premiere party in New York because she had to go home to study for her high school final exams. /// When fully dressed and in make-up, Natalie Portman and Keira Knightley resembled each other so much, that even when Knightley's mother visited the set she had trouble identifying her own daughter. /// On the casting front Kyle MacLachlan was considered for the role of Qui-Gon Jinn, while Kenneth Branagh was originally considered for the role of Obi-Wan Kenobi. /// The communicator that is used to Qui-Gon Jinn is actually a redecorated Sensor Excel Razor for Women.
Considering its sizeable $115 million budget it's really baffling to see how cheap the film has a tendency to look. With that kind of financial backing it's quite an achievement to deliver something that frequently looks so tacky. By supposedly improving the effects with the introduction of state-of-the-art CGI the majority of the characters look so much worse and much more fake than any puppet or costume from the original trilogy ever could. Not only did they look better but they had so much more charm and character to them. Even practical effects such as the homes on Tatooine have a tendency to look really cheap and cardboardy. And the attempts at having actors interacting with the computer animation are just dreadful. The film stands as an interesting marker for the level of technology at the time of its inception. The CGI does undoubtedly deliver some great eye candy when it comes to creating ships, cities, worlds etc. However when it comes to trying to portray actual living, breathing characters it comes up considerably short. It really does show both the abilities of the technology of the time, as well as its limitations. Although that being said, Phantom was released in the same year as The Matrix. Although when you compare the two that really is quite hard to believe. Especially when you take into account that Phantom's budget was close to being twice as much as The Matrix. In comparison Phantom's bright, day-glo coloured world of childish 'fun' seems pretty pathetic and silly against the grittier, noir-tinged world of The Matrix. It just comes off as looking like a cheap fantasy mini-series on the Syfy channel.

Alongside Jar Jar the other major downfall of the film lies in the casting of Jake Lloyd as young Anakin Skywalker. I'm not going to rip into the young kid however. He wasn't even 10 years old at the time of filming and clearly he didn't have any acting talent whatsoever. So what exactly was he supposed to do? No the real blame certainly lies at the feet of Lucas. If you're going to place such focus on the character surely you should hire an actor who actually has a shred of talent. Or attempt to mine some kind of performance out of him through his direction. Or at the very least don't lumber him with some truly groan-inducing dialogue; “are you an angel?” In fact that whole sorta romance that the film is attempting to hint at between Anakin and Portman's Padme is just ill conceived and really awkward, not least down to the fact that he's a little kid and there's like 10 years in age between them.

Well after so much criticisms let's try and find some positives. Eh........eh.........oh I've got one! I've always had a bit of a lazy eye, but after the amount of exercise it got from watching this film I wouldn't be surprised if I had cured it. I have honestly never rolled my eyes so much in my entire life. No seriously. Even if he didn't make a great contribution to the film it was a nice moment when Yoda is reintroduced to us, while despite the character he gets Samuel L Jackson makes an impression just as a result of his natural charisma. And then there is Darth Maul. While he perhaps doesn't get enough exposure to make it possible to call him a saving grace he is certainly one of, if not the highlight of the film. Visually he is a very evocative creation, it's just a shame that he isn't given enough screentime to really develop the character. His inclusion also allows the film to deliver it's one truly stand-out moment, the lightsaber duel between Maul and the team of Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon. With great choreography it's just about the only occasion where the film really soars to the kind of exciting and thrilling heights of the original trilogy. The double sided lightsaber? Freaking awesome! Shame I can't say the same about anything else in the film.

It's actually tough to try and figure out what about Lucas' contribution deserves the most criticism. Is it his truly awful dialogue? His direction in which he apparently only cares about the effects and has zero interest in his cast? Some of the directions that he decided to take the series in? I mean midi-chlorians? Really? Midi-f*cking-chlorians?!!! He removed so much of the mystique of the Jedis with that move. I loved thinking of them along the same lines as Shaolin monks; individuals who were just able to tap into a higher form of thinking and abilities. I wouldn't have been totally against Lucas trying to introduced a scientific element to explain them, but midi-chlorians? As a director he seems about as far removed from being an 'actor's director' as is humanly possible. He really does seem to only care about all of his precious special effects, taking absolutely no interest in the cast which unsurprisingly results in a series of stiff, stilted performances. And his dialogue? Holy crap it's bad! So many of the lines are just cringeworthy. Oh and all of that clumsy exposition about issues such as midi-chlorians! It would have been less jarring had the film just paused for a break every now and then, and instead had Lucas pop up in the bottom corner of the screen to explain things like the guy that provides sign language for the deaf.

The sad thing is that The Phantom Menace could have been a great film with just a few very minor tweaks. Hiring a director who could actually direct for instance. And a writer who can actually write. And a child actor who can actually act. And employing special effects which were actually good. And killing Jar Jar Binks after twenty seconds of screen time. And not having the future Darth Vader called Ani all the time......(4 hours later)......and dumping the midi-chlorians idea. And disposing of the fart jokes. And actually giving a damn about the characters. And not having Greedo shoot first. I know that last one isn't from this film but screw you George, we know Han shot first!

Conclusion - Wow. Just wow. This really is one of the worst films I've seen in a long time. In fact it's probably one of the worst films I've ever seen. Certainly if you discount films that were so bad they managed to make it all the way back round to become somewhat enjoyable in their ineptitude. The Phantom Menace however was just bad. Really, really bad. I appreciate that the film had the unenviable task of trying to provide the set-up for the immense, sprawling story that was to follow but good god it's so dull!!! Had it not had the original trilogy to rely on it's hard to imagine that anyone could really have cared for Star Wars as a franchise is this had been the first instalment. What had once been childlike in its sense of fun and wonder is not just childish. Awful!



Excellent review!! Along the same lines as I had. I can watch it... just not very often.

I tried the 6 film marathon about a year ago. I watched Episode I and II... then stopped. I couldn't take any more.
Have you done Ep II yet JayDee? I rated it lower than Ep I.



We've gone on holiday by mistake
I ****ing hate George Lucas.



Excellent review!! Along the same lines as I had. I can watch it... just not very often.

I tried the 6 film marathon about a year ago. I watched Episode I and II... then stopped. I couldn't take any more.
Have you done Ep II yet JayDee? I rated it lower than Ep I.
I saw Episode 1 and kept expecting it to start getting good - bad sign. I saw Episode 2 (sort of) and found myself studying the walls of the cinema. I jolted back to reality thinking this should not be happening in a Star Wars movie. I have never seen Episode 3 and can't imagine that will ever change.

I ****ing hate George Lucas.
I'm hearing ya!
__________________
“The Universe is under no obligation to make sense to you.”
― Neil deGrasse Tyson



^ Episode III is definitely the stronger of the prequels. If anything, I'd actually recommend seeing it over Ep I and II.



^ Episode III is definitely the stronger of the prequels. If anything, I'd actually recommend seeing it over Ep I and II.
Maybe...one day...but I'll have to work up to it.



Did they mop this floor with Dr. Pepper?!
I have never seen Episode 3 and can't imagine that will ever change.
Although it's not saying much, I think Episode III is the strongest of the prequels.

Has anyone seen any of the hundreds of fan edits out there? I would recommend the edits by The Phantom Editor. Of course they aren't masterpieces or anything. But, there's no more midi-chlorians!



We've gone on holiday by mistake
Yeah saying Episode 3 is the best is like saying I enjoyed the crap I took today much more than the last 2 days.



My own ratings. Page 3 Rodent's Reviews

A New Hope 100%
The Empire Strikes Back 100%
Return Of The Jedi 98%

The Phantom Menace 20%
Attack Of The Clones 5%
Revenge Of The Sith 55%