Day 128: September 5th , 2010
Machete
Machete Don't Text.
Grindhouse was the most fun I had in the theatre in a long time and that experience I believe won't be matched. It had the right amount of everything and the entire audience was enthralled by it. It failed at the box office, which made it even more of a true Grindhouse film. Now we have Machete, a full length feature film based on one of the trailers that was attached to Grindhouse. Out of all the trailers, this one had the most potential to be an actual film, and here we are. Machete was a lot more fun in trailer form, then it is in feature form.
I had fun here, but the film is a lot less Grindhouse and a lot more political. It starts off with a great bang and has the audience set up for a bloody good time. It's violence was unrelenting. Then it starts to suffer from it's story line, it's lack of tongue in cheekiness and the length. The film still has great moments, but they are only scattered throughout a disjointed piece. Machete was perfect for the trailer, and only mediocre for it's film.
The film surprisingly has a strong cast. Danny Trejo is the title character and the story of the trailer is the exact story here. He is hired to do a job and is double crossed. He was hired by Lapidus, I'm sorry, Jeff Fahey, to assassinate Robert DeNiro. We later find out that it was all an attempt to get more sympathy votes for him when he survives the assassination and the police start looking for Machete. There are subplots about immigration that really take over the story and are in your face with it's content. Jessica Alba is the Immigration Officer, she still is a bad actress, even in a piece like this. Michelle Rodriguez is apart of a resistance called The Network, who go after DeNiro, the Senator.
Other parts of the cast are played by horror make-up legend Tom Savini, Robert Rodriguez long time pal Cheech Marin, Don Johnson, Lindsay Lohan who seems to be playing herself and Steven Freakin Seagal. With a cast like this you would expect it to be really campy and B style, but it takes itself way to seriously at moments and it loses it's sights on things. Seagal could have been great in this piece, but instead he sits around and talks the whole time until a fight at the end, which clearly shows his age and the fact that he has let himself go. The standouts are Don Johnson and Jeff Fahey, they play their evil roles perfectly and fit right into this film. DeNiro is a bit off here, he isn't his usual self and he seems out of place at times. I didn't know if he was trying to hard or was phoning it in.
The film is violent and bloody. People loose limbs, heads and what not. It's clearly over the top and it plays on that very well. The rest of the time you're waiting for it to get to the good parts. Danny Trejo is great, but he is no leading man. He should stick to character pieces, although I am glad he finally got his spotlight. He is one scary and ugly looking guy, who always seems to get the ladies *cue porn music*.
Machete is something that could have been great fun, but it leaves most of the fun in 2007 with Grindhouse. A heavy political theme drowns it out too much and it actually tries to give the viewers a message instead of simply being a low grade trashy film. I had more fun with Piranha 3D than Machete, which is a surprise.
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