Meatwadsprite's Slow Review Thread

You wouldn't have to explain the film scene by scene to be able to show why the film's pacing is all dat' and a bag of chips.

It seems like you just use words like "pacing" to try to sound smart, but you don't actually know what it means.

Defend yourself!


By the way, thanks for ignoring my comment about you referencing the franchise without seeing the franchise.

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Just so you know, Jason does appear in the original film, he jumps out of the lake at the end.

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"A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have."

Suspect's Reviews

Agreed. My Ex-girlfriend used to complain about some scenes being muddled and too dark on the previous DVD, and that it took away from her enjoyment of the film because it was distracting and she had trouble suspending disbelief. The presentation of this film is clearly a significant factor in the level of enjoyment one can attain, it seems.

'nuff said. Glad ya liked it.

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this guy ? he couldn't play hockey if his life depended on it

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You still haven't even tried to explain what you meant by "movie so bad that the main character of the franchise doesn't even appear in it". This can only mean that you believe the movie is bad because it didn't have Jason in it as the main character.

Sequels were never planned when this movie was first made, and Jason was never supposed to be the main character of an entire franchise: screenwriter Victor Miller says that his appearance was supposed to be just a juicy detail in the story about a crazy woman who wants to revenge her son's death. The producers liked the final scene, and decided to make Jason the main character of the next movie.

To anyone reading your review, it feels as if you dislike the movie because Jason wasn't the main character, which means that you like the sequels better because he is in them, yet later you say that this is the only movie in the franchise you've seen. When asked to elaborate on what you said, your only answers so far have been: "I never said introducing the killer early was a good thing" and "he couldn't play hockey if his life depended on it". Okay, so explain what you were trying to say.

And please, oh please, do explain what this means: "though the camp location sounds like a new setting for a movie - it's barley captured for the isolated place it is." The visuals are full of barley? What?

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I'm not sure how you can get so much from a simple phrase

"movie so bad that the main character of the franchise doesn't even appear in it"

explanation : the movie is very bad , and the popular jason character from the sequels does not appear in it

Simple as that , don't try to act like I've said things I haven't

2006
---------------------------
Amazing
Little Miss Sunshine
The Departed
The Science of Sleep
Thank You For Smoking
Children of Men
Pan's Labyrinth
Little Children

Very Good
Dave Chappelle's Block Party
Inside Man
Babel
Borat

Pretty Good
16 Blocks
Cars
Volver
Clerks 2

Almost Good
Click
Grandma's Boy
V for Vendetta
Open Season
Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny

Sucks
Idiocracy
A Scanner Darkley
Crank
Snakes on a Plane
Superman Returns
The Illusionist
Casino Royale
Jesus Camp
Ice Age : The Meltdown
Half Nelson
Stranger Than Fiction
The Shaggy Dog
Scary Movie 4
Dreamgirls

Juno (1 viewing)



Plot : 16 year old Juno MacGuff (Ellen Page) gets pregnant with a friend her same age.

Story : Once Juno finds she's pregnant she decides to deliver the baby : unable to go through the abortion procedure. Her parent's help her a lot throughout the whole thing : but she still has to decide what to do with the baby. She decides to give the baby to a couple advertising themselves in a newspaper. As you will get used to once your half-way into the film : the events here sometimes fold out in important manner and other times are not very important at all. This is where the film loses a lot of power - throwing in unimportant obstacles at you and overall make the movie feel unimportant.

Visuals : An incredibly enjoyable film as far as visuals go - another beautifull film from Jason Reitman. Everything is placed exactly where it should be and captures much more emotion than it's story ever could.

Sypnosis : Very upsetting blend of amazing visuals - some of the best acting in a movie and some highly original parts : then mixed with a story that can't capture it's characters at all. The music soundtrack to the movie is also a letdown.

I thought all of these films were stunning... although upon second viewing I didn't really like Jesus Camp.

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I used to be addicted to crystal meth, now I'm just addicted to Breaking Bad.

Unimportant? Please explain.

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“The gladdest moment in human life, methinks, is a departure into unknown lands.” – Sir Richard Burton

Explain further please?

He's never going to explain, you'll get used to it after a while.

"Worst reviews ever."

Delicatessen (1 viewing)



Plot : In a post apocalyptic world - an apartment complex that relies on eating it's new members : runs into problems when a smarter victim arrives.

Story : After seeing an advertisement in the paper - recently retired clown Louison gets a job at delicatessen : though he doesn't know how they treat their newest employee. As Louison starts to do some odd-jobs around the place - his stay starts to become much longer than his predecesors. The longer that Louison is kept alive the more the tennats keep complaining about food to the man in charge of the whole opertation - Clapet the butcher. But , before the butcher can serve up Louison to the others - his own daughter starts a relationship with him : and eventually ruins the cycle of canibalism.

Visuals : The film is mostly dominated by darker browns and reds/oranges and is really enjoyable visually for the most part. Though the colors do go through some very brief periods of different colors - they aren't done well at all. The scene towards the beginning of the film will suck you in not only into the visuals - but the film's story as well.

Sypnosis : An original idea with a not so original story , great visuals with some humor thrown in , and a bleak look into the future of the world.

• Mark (Bateman) just vanishes
• Pauly Bleeker (Micheal Sera) ends up having a big role in the movie though he isn't as nearly developed as some other characters in the movie
• The characters that are there are barley fleshed out
• Details like the music and guitars seem tacked on and not important at all

I think Friday the 13th is the only one of the dozen films in the series I can watch, because it was done on a shoestring budget with a ton of passion and care in comparison to the other also-rans... It's actually a well-done little indy suspense flick, before the term "slasher" was even coined. I own a copy, and don't own any of the silly Jason crap that followed... The guy used creative camera work coupled with a tense score to create a lot of suspense. Under-rated film, for sure...

What I want to know is, how you can come down on a film like The Illusionist... First off, the film didn't come out in 2007, so including it on a list of 2007 films illustrates a clear lack of research on this list in general, and, The Illusionist was fantastic. Even if you didn't care for the subject matter, you must at least recognize it's technical achievements...

that's a list of 2006 not 07

I don't remember much of the illusionists - for a reason : it's story wasn't anything special. I don't remember being amazed by it's visuals either.

BARELY. Not BARLEY. You use barley every single time you mean barely. Please, please, please learn to spell if you want to be taken even remotely seriously. Stop the madness.

MeatWad, I can only imagine your reaction to my last post, and for that, I thank you.



Thanks for the negative rep too.

I typed pimpdashizzle in google and this poped up - http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/...EL._AA240_.jpg i can only assume it's his favorite film.