tonymontana32
05-15-04, 03:36 PM
i just recently wrote a horror script. i would like for some of you to read it and tell me what you think. it might be kind of hard to follow just by reading, but make sure you read the WHOLE THING if you plan on replying. any help appreciated, thanks.
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horror script
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1. EXT. Woods - Night 1.
We’re watching through a home video camera. STEVE is walking alone in the woods. We can’t see much with the camera‘s light, just shadows and leaves and sticks, things of that nature. There is no sound except for the sound of STEVE walking through the brush. After a while, an eerie sound is heard. STEVE turns the camera back and forth, looking for the noise. Soon he steadies the camera in one direction, and when the noise ends up behind him he turns around. Slowly, the camera starts to TILT down as STEVE stares on in horror at something unseen. Then the camera drops, STEVE falls, and a large booted foot steps on his hand which lands in front of the camera’s view.
Fade out.
CREDITS AND SUCH
2. EXT. Woods - Same 2.
The view is again with STEVE’s home camera. All we see right now is STEVE’s arm in front of the camera. A rustling is in the background, and soon STEVE’s wrist is picked up by a large hand and moved out of the view of the camera. Soon the camera is picked up by the man who moved STEVE. He picks it up and walks with it, and we hear the sound of him dragging STEVE through the trail.
The view from the home video camera is shaky as the man hold it in one hand and Steve in the other. The sound of the dragging continues until finally the reach a stop at the entrance to a barn or shack-like place. The camera view steadies for the most part, and we hear the creak of a door open.
3. INT. Barn - Same 3.
The man steps inside with STEVE and drags him a little further, to the center of the shack. There, he drops his arm and let’s go of him. Then he steps to a counter and sets the video camera down. He then walks away. He moves over to Steve and we hear the sounds of beating and thrashing as the man beats STEVE to a bloody pulp. Then he puts STEVE into a body bag.
After the beating, the man walks away and we hear the sound of him walking up the steps. Soon he reaches the door at the top and turns off the dim lights. When he’s gone, nothing happens for a while, then the body bag starts to shake. Soon, STEVE manages to undo part of the zipper, then soon he pulls apart the top opening and climbs out cautiously.
STEVE makes his way out of the body bag as quiet as he can, then moves over to the video camera. He takes it with him, and slowly moves towards the steps. Now, he’s holding the camera to see what he’s seeing.
As he’s walking up the steps, a set of piercing red eyes greets him from by the set of stairs. This startles STEVE, and as he overcomes his fear the man shoves him backwards down the steps. After his fall, he looks up, leaving the camera on the floor. The lights turn back on.
The man, who pushed STEVE down the steps, comes over to STEVE and begins to beat him again. He then puts him back in the body bag, and locks him in a tiny cellar. Then he walks away back up the steps, leaving the camera at the foot of the set of stairs, and turning off the lights again.
At the moment the darkness again floods the room, STEVE squirms and moves around violently in the tiny cellar. For some moments, he thrashes about trying to get out of the tiny imprisonment, without success. STEVE is screaming, trying frantically to get out.
Fade out.
4. EXT. Woods - Same 4.
We find ourselves, looking through the home video camera, in the woods watching the man walk out the back door. He comes with an axe. He then moves over to a large stump. A small candle-lamp is on a short table next to him.
He moves out of view to grab a log, then comes back into view to chop it. After some chopping he has a satisfactory stack of firewood, and picks it up and walks back into the cabin. Then after some time (while he takes it to the basement), he comes back for the camera.
5. INT. Barn - Same 5.
We’re watching through the camera with the man as he walks down the steps into the basement. He sets the camera on the similar table, then leaves for the firewood. STEVE picks up the camera, unseen, and sets it down next to him. When the man comes back down, he looks for the camera, is startled, then drops to the ground with the firewood as STEVE knocks him on the head with a large yard tool.
Fade out.
6. INT. Police Station - Morning 6.
All we can see right now is a chair behind a desk. The camera remains still for a while. We hear the door open and OFFICER 1 and STEVE walk in, and then OFFICER 1 comes into view and sits down at the chair. We keep on the chair, seeing only the lower half of OFFICER 1. He begins to talk to STEVE.
OFFICER 1
So, that’s it?
STEVE
Basically.
OFFICER 1
Well, how did you get out of the cellar?
STEVE
Shook it enough and it broke open.
Now, the camera starts to pan up, slowly seeing all of OFFICER 1, then him and the desk, then the desk and both the men in the seats.
OFFICER 1
That’s all it took? You broke a lock by shaking it a little bit?
STEVE
It wasn’t a little bit, he must’ve been gone for over an hour before he came back into the basement.
OFFICER 1
That reminds me, who is “he”?
STEVE
How should I know?
OFFICER 1
You don’t know him?
STEVE
No. The whole time the guy was beating me, how should I have known who he was?
OFFICER 1
You could’ve looked for a license or something.
STEVE
Would you have?
OFFICER 1
Probably.
STEVE rolls his eyes and sighs.
OFFICER 1
Well just tell me, what happened after you “broke the lock” on the cellar.
STEVE
I knocked the guy out.
OFFICER 1
I heard that. Then what?
STEVE
I just made a break for it. I didn’t know where I was or anything, so I just ran.
7. EXT. Woods - Night 7.
STEVE is running through the woods. The camera is at his side, in his hand, bobbing up and down with his steps. We hear the rustle of the leaves, cracking of sticks, and STEVE’s heavy panting.
8. EXT. Graveyard - Same 8.
Soon he reaches a graveyard. He steadies the camera by his face so we see what he sees. Still, we hear his heavy panting. The graveyard obviously has various graves, but farther back there are rows of pews and a well in the front.
STEVE steps forward, and soon reaches the part where the pews and well are. There, sitting in the front row of pews, is someone with their back turned, and we can’t really see who or what it is. STEVE cautiously makes his way forward. He keeps the camera facing towards the well, but it drops when he reaches the front row of pews. All we see is the grass when the camera drops and the sound of more beating and gory, bloody fighting takes place.
9. INT. Police Station - Morning 9.
STEVE and OFFICER 1 are sitting in the same positions as before.
OFFICER 1
So he started beating you?
STEVE
Yeah.
OFFICER 1
Did you get a read on this guy?
STEVE
What do you think?
OFFICER 1
So, no idea who he was, never seen him before.
STEVE
Nope.
OFFICER 1
So then what?
10. EXT. Graveyard - Night 10.
All we see from STEVE’s camera is a body being dropped down the well. The face is towards the bottom so that we can’t see who it is. From the view of the camera, all we see next is a cover being put on the well.
11. INT. Police Station - Morning 11.
Same thing as before.
OFFICER 1
So you got thrown down a well? I don’t believe this.
STEVE
What’s not to believe?
OFFICER 1
How am I supposed to go by what you say? It’s not very likely that someone gets thrown down a well and lives to tell the tale.
STEVE
Ok, I’ll give you that, but it did happen. Anyways, as I was saying. . . The police arrived a little after that, because as I remember, it was getting kind of close to dawn when I got to the graveyard.
12. EXT. Graveyard - Dawn 12.
We’re watching through the video camera that is now behind a pew, just seeing the street entrance to the graveyard. We see a police car arrive on the scene, with two cops getting out. They both walk over to the well. Uncovering it, they see and hear someone from inside, but it is not STEVE.
13. INT. Police Station - Morning 13.
Same thing as before.
OFFICER 1
So the cops got you out of the well?
STEVE
Do you want to see the tape?
OFFICER 1
No, but speaking of that, how’d you get the tape back?
14. EXT. Graveyard - Dawn 14.
Soon the camera begins to move, as we see from behind it the killing of the two policemen.
15. INT. Police Station - Morning 15.
Same thing as before.
STEVE
I figured the guy would run off, but he didn’t. When the cops were trying to get me out of the well, he came out of nowhere and tried to stop them. They tried to arrest him, but he kept struggling. Soon enough he dropped the camera and ran out into the woods.
OFFICER 1
Ok. So, what happened to the police officers?
STEVE
What do you think happened? They got me out of the well and brought me back here.
OFFICER 1
Mr. Allen, the alleged cops that rescued from the well were never reported to have brought you back. If you can remember, you came by yourself with the camera.
STEVE is quiet, realizing he’s been caught. He sits for a moment, and we see a very quick shot of him lunging at OFFICER 1.
16. EXT. Graveyard - Dawn 16.
STEVE is dragging the bodies of the two cops down the well with the man he killed. The camera that we’re watching through is sitting down on the front pew. Soon, STEVE comes over and picks it up, turns it off, and the screen goes black.
Straight Cut to credits.
well, if you didnt get what was going on, steve was actually the killer the whole time. he went back to frame the one guy for revenge (from something that doesn't play into the script), and taped in the hope of him getting the guy thrown in jail. tell me what you think.
------------------------------------------------------------
horror script
------------------------------------------------------------
1. EXT. Woods - Night 1.
We’re watching through a home video camera. STEVE is walking alone in the woods. We can’t see much with the camera‘s light, just shadows and leaves and sticks, things of that nature. There is no sound except for the sound of STEVE walking through the brush. After a while, an eerie sound is heard. STEVE turns the camera back and forth, looking for the noise. Soon he steadies the camera in one direction, and when the noise ends up behind him he turns around. Slowly, the camera starts to TILT down as STEVE stares on in horror at something unseen. Then the camera drops, STEVE falls, and a large booted foot steps on his hand which lands in front of the camera’s view.
Fade out.
CREDITS AND SUCH
2. EXT. Woods - Same 2.
The view is again with STEVE’s home camera. All we see right now is STEVE’s arm in front of the camera. A rustling is in the background, and soon STEVE’s wrist is picked up by a large hand and moved out of the view of the camera. Soon the camera is picked up by the man who moved STEVE. He picks it up and walks with it, and we hear the sound of him dragging STEVE through the trail.
The view from the home video camera is shaky as the man hold it in one hand and Steve in the other. The sound of the dragging continues until finally the reach a stop at the entrance to a barn or shack-like place. The camera view steadies for the most part, and we hear the creak of a door open.
3. INT. Barn - Same 3.
The man steps inside with STEVE and drags him a little further, to the center of the shack. There, he drops his arm and let’s go of him. Then he steps to a counter and sets the video camera down. He then walks away. He moves over to Steve and we hear the sounds of beating and thrashing as the man beats STEVE to a bloody pulp. Then he puts STEVE into a body bag.
After the beating, the man walks away and we hear the sound of him walking up the steps. Soon he reaches the door at the top and turns off the dim lights. When he’s gone, nothing happens for a while, then the body bag starts to shake. Soon, STEVE manages to undo part of the zipper, then soon he pulls apart the top opening and climbs out cautiously.
STEVE makes his way out of the body bag as quiet as he can, then moves over to the video camera. He takes it with him, and slowly moves towards the steps. Now, he’s holding the camera to see what he’s seeing.
As he’s walking up the steps, a set of piercing red eyes greets him from by the set of stairs. This startles STEVE, and as he overcomes his fear the man shoves him backwards down the steps. After his fall, he looks up, leaving the camera on the floor. The lights turn back on.
The man, who pushed STEVE down the steps, comes over to STEVE and begins to beat him again. He then puts him back in the body bag, and locks him in a tiny cellar. Then he walks away back up the steps, leaving the camera at the foot of the set of stairs, and turning off the lights again.
At the moment the darkness again floods the room, STEVE squirms and moves around violently in the tiny cellar. For some moments, he thrashes about trying to get out of the tiny imprisonment, without success. STEVE is screaming, trying frantically to get out.
Fade out.
4. EXT. Woods - Same 4.
We find ourselves, looking through the home video camera, in the woods watching the man walk out the back door. He comes with an axe. He then moves over to a large stump. A small candle-lamp is on a short table next to him.
He moves out of view to grab a log, then comes back into view to chop it. After some chopping he has a satisfactory stack of firewood, and picks it up and walks back into the cabin. Then after some time (while he takes it to the basement), he comes back for the camera.
5. INT. Barn - Same 5.
We’re watching through the camera with the man as he walks down the steps into the basement. He sets the camera on the similar table, then leaves for the firewood. STEVE picks up the camera, unseen, and sets it down next to him. When the man comes back down, he looks for the camera, is startled, then drops to the ground with the firewood as STEVE knocks him on the head with a large yard tool.
Fade out.
6. INT. Police Station - Morning 6.
All we can see right now is a chair behind a desk. The camera remains still for a while. We hear the door open and OFFICER 1 and STEVE walk in, and then OFFICER 1 comes into view and sits down at the chair. We keep on the chair, seeing only the lower half of OFFICER 1. He begins to talk to STEVE.
OFFICER 1
So, that’s it?
STEVE
Basically.
OFFICER 1
Well, how did you get out of the cellar?
STEVE
Shook it enough and it broke open.
Now, the camera starts to pan up, slowly seeing all of OFFICER 1, then him and the desk, then the desk and both the men in the seats.
OFFICER 1
That’s all it took? You broke a lock by shaking it a little bit?
STEVE
It wasn’t a little bit, he must’ve been gone for over an hour before he came back into the basement.
OFFICER 1
That reminds me, who is “he”?
STEVE
How should I know?
OFFICER 1
You don’t know him?
STEVE
No. The whole time the guy was beating me, how should I have known who he was?
OFFICER 1
You could’ve looked for a license or something.
STEVE
Would you have?
OFFICER 1
Probably.
STEVE rolls his eyes and sighs.
OFFICER 1
Well just tell me, what happened after you “broke the lock” on the cellar.
STEVE
I knocked the guy out.
OFFICER 1
I heard that. Then what?
STEVE
I just made a break for it. I didn’t know where I was or anything, so I just ran.
7. EXT. Woods - Night 7.
STEVE is running through the woods. The camera is at his side, in his hand, bobbing up and down with his steps. We hear the rustle of the leaves, cracking of sticks, and STEVE’s heavy panting.
8. EXT. Graveyard - Same 8.
Soon he reaches a graveyard. He steadies the camera by his face so we see what he sees. Still, we hear his heavy panting. The graveyard obviously has various graves, but farther back there are rows of pews and a well in the front.
STEVE steps forward, and soon reaches the part where the pews and well are. There, sitting in the front row of pews, is someone with their back turned, and we can’t really see who or what it is. STEVE cautiously makes his way forward. He keeps the camera facing towards the well, but it drops when he reaches the front row of pews. All we see is the grass when the camera drops and the sound of more beating and gory, bloody fighting takes place.
9. INT. Police Station - Morning 9.
STEVE and OFFICER 1 are sitting in the same positions as before.
OFFICER 1
So he started beating you?
STEVE
Yeah.
OFFICER 1
Did you get a read on this guy?
STEVE
What do you think?
OFFICER 1
So, no idea who he was, never seen him before.
STEVE
Nope.
OFFICER 1
So then what?
10. EXT. Graveyard - Night 10.
All we see from STEVE’s camera is a body being dropped down the well. The face is towards the bottom so that we can’t see who it is. From the view of the camera, all we see next is a cover being put on the well.
11. INT. Police Station - Morning 11.
Same thing as before.
OFFICER 1
So you got thrown down a well? I don’t believe this.
STEVE
What’s not to believe?
OFFICER 1
How am I supposed to go by what you say? It’s not very likely that someone gets thrown down a well and lives to tell the tale.
STEVE
Ok, I’ll give you that, but it did happen. Anyways, as I was saying. . . The police arrived a little after that, because as I remember, it was getting kind of close to dawn when I got to the graveyard.
12. EXT. Graveyard - Dawn 12.
We’re watching through the video camera that is now behind a pew, just seeing the street entrance to the graveyard. We see a police car arrive on the scene, with two cops getting out. They both walk over to the well. Uncovering it, they see and hear someone from inside, but it is not STEVE.
13. INT. Police Station - Morning 13.
Same thing as before.
OFFICER 1
So the cops got you out of the well?
STEVE
Do you want to see the tape?
OFFICER 1
No, but speaking of that, how’d you get the tape back?
14. EXT. Graveyard - Dawn 14.
Soon the camera begins to move, as we see from behind it the killing of the two policemen.
15. INT. Police Station - Morning 15.
Same thing as before.
STEVE
I figured the guy would run off, but he didn’t. When the cops were trying to get me out of the well, he came out of nowhere and tried to stop them. They tried to arrest him, but he kept struggling. Soon enough he dropped the camera and ran out into the woods.
OFFICER 1
Ok. So, what happened to the police officers?
STEVE
What do you think happened? They got me out of the well and brought me back here.
OFFICER 1
Mr. Allen, the alleged cops that rescued from the well were never reported to have brought you back. If you can remember, you came by yourself with the camera.
STEVE is quiet, realizing he’s been caught. He sits for a moment, and we see a very quick shot of him lunging at OFFICER 1.
16. EXT. Graveyard - Dawn 16.
STEVE is dragging the bodies of the two cops down the well with the man he killed. The camera that we’re watching through is sitting down on the front pew. Soon, STEVE comes over and picks it up, turns it off, and the screen goes black.
Straight Cut to credits.
well, if you didnt get what was going on, steve was actually the killer the whole time. he went back to frame the one guy for revenge (from something that doesn't play into the script), and taped in the hope of him getting the guy thrown in jail. tell me what you think.