The Big Hit Quick Review

[Oh Brother Movie Reviews]

Straight Jackin! My cohort and I finished our review on The Big Hit for our podcast (Oh Brother Movie Reviews), and it turns out that this is among the best movies of the late 90s. It stars Lou Diamond Phillips as Cisco, and Mark Wahlberg as Melvin Smiley. Cisco and Mel have a few other co-workers they team up with to pull off hits for their boss, Paris. As a side job, Cisco sets up an unauthorized kidnapping of the daughter of a (supposedly) rich electronics mogul, Nishi. Turns out Nishi is broke because he recently funded a big budget movie, Taste the Golden Spray, starring Nishi himself. Oh, he also directed it. Unfortunately for Cisco and Mel, the girl they kidnap just so happens to be the goddaughter of Paris, their boss. Cisco turns evil to save his own hide, frames Mel for it all, and meets with a bad end. Lou Diamond Phillips plays an amazing character. Cisco is hilarious! His gansta way of talking never gets old. Mark Wahlberg, on the other hand, talks in the softest, most annoying voice throughout the entire movie. We have the character Crunch, another one of their hitmen comrades, who has just discovered the joys of pleasuring himself! He got so much action his entire life, he never had to worry about that. So it's all he thinks about, and he ejaculates the phrase "straight jackin'" numerous times. Now we come to Nishi's daughter. A terrible actress. She cannot deliver a line to save her soul. My brother couldn't even watch her scenes. He sped right through them. But she is pretty hot. This is a great movie. There are so many little things, such as Nishi's name appearing on the trace busters (or bustas) or King Kong Lives being watched in the background, that are awesome. Mel needs to return King Kong to get this nerdy video store kid off his back. Strangely, this kid is probably my favorite character in the movie. So if you want a fun action movie, check this out. Late 90s action at its best!

~Chris and Matt
Oh Brother Movie Reviews