TheUsualSuspect
06-04-12, 12:06 AM
Piranha 3DD
http://cdn.screenrant.com/wp-content/uploads/piranha-3dd-red-band-trailer.jpg
In The Running To Be The Worst Film Of The Year
Those pesky piranhas are at it again, this time they've made their way to a water park to chew on a bunch of naked women. Now it's up to Maddy, a young gal who co-owns half the water park, to get the people out of the water.
The first Piranha delivered the right amount of blood and camp to make it enjoyable. There were scenes that were over the top hilarious and going in knowing this helped a lot. In this uninspired sequel the setting has been changed to a water park. Huge mistake.
I don't really know where to start. Lets start with the 3D. It manages to be worse than the original. Which is bizarre considering the filmed this entry in 3D. This film is a huge disappointment. I went in expecting it to be AT LEAST, half as fun as the original. I knew what I was getting myself into, but I didn't expect it to be utterly unwatchable. Not even the cameo of THE HOFF can save this trash.
I don't expect good acting, but I don't expect direct to video fare, especially from people like Panabaker, Bowden and Koechner. The worst aspect of this film is the script. Horrible, utterly horrible. The poor excuse they have for the piranhas getting into the park is ridiculous, the situations the characters find themselves in is laughable. A van going into the water, people stuck inside and on top. The worst offender is when two characters are "stuck" on a dock and the piranhas are destroying the wooden planks from underneath. Not only the worse scene in the film, but probably one of the worst scenes I've ever seen in my life. Poorly acted, directed, edited and written.
The entire film is lazy. The fun is gone, most of the laughs are from The Hoff, but even that wears thin quickly. Gary Busey has a small role in the beginning, the film seriously needed more of him. He never had the opportunity to get his crazy on. The scene where he bites the head off the fish and spits it out is in the trailer, that's all he does. Ving Rhames has his best part ruined in the trailer a well. The film doesn't take itself seriously, which is obvious from the get go with dead fart jokes, but the comedy is more miss than hit. I laughed twice, one involving child endangerment the other is the Baywatch parody.
The naked women were even excessive and unneeded. It all feels forced to capture the exact same formula of the first, but the water park setting doesn't work for that. One thing this film lacked were the Kelly Brook and Riley Steele characters. Here Koechner fires all the lifeguards and hires strippers. The stripper lifeguards do nothing, opportunity wasted.
A ridiculous sex scene puts this film over the top. The scene doesn't play it funny enough, or grotesque enough. It's caught in some odd place in the middle. Yet the film seems to keep the tradition of severed penises afloat. Absolutely no plot whatsoever. The original at least tried, the sequel makes no effort. The attack is actually boring. Not as gory or as fun as the original. It seemed to be cut fairly badly too.
This film is tamer, lamer and something that rhymes with lamer. It makes no effort at all. Usually with sequels you want to go bigger and better, not the case with Piranha 3DD. The film is incredibly short, so expect to see ten or so minutes of outtakes during the credits. Even going in expecting it to be bad doesn't prepare you for the awfulness you will endure.
0.5
For comparison, here is my Piranha review. (http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?t=23462&highlight=piranha)
http://cdn.screenrant.com/wp-content/uploads/piranha-3dd-red-band-trailer.jpg
In The Running To Be The Worst Film Of The Year
Those pesky piranhas are at it again, this time they've made their way to a water park to chew on a bunch of naked women. Now it's up to Maddy, a young gal who co-owns half the water park, to get the people out of the water.
The first Piranha delivered the right amount of blood and camp to make it enjoyable. There were scenes that were over the top hilarious and going in knowing this helped a lot. In this uninspired sequel the setting has been changed to a water park. Huge mistake.
I don't really know where to start. Lets start with the 3D. It manages to be worse than the original. Which is bizarre considering the filmed this entry in 3D. This film is a huge disappointment. I went in expecting it to be AT LEAST, half as fun as the original. I knew what I was getting myself into, but I didn't expect it to be utterly unwatchable. Not even the cameo of THE HOFF can save this trash.
I don't expect good acting, but I don't expect direct to video fare, especially from people like Panabaker, Bowden and Koechner. The worst aspect of this film is the script. Horrible, utterly horrible. The poor excuse they have for the piranhas getting into the park is ridiculous, the situations the characters find themselves in is laughable. A van going into the water, people stuck inside and on top. The worst offender is when two characters are "stuck" on a dock and the piranhas are destroying the wooden planks from underneath. Not only the worse scene in the film, but probably one of the worst scenes I've ever seen in my life. Poorly acted, directed, edited and written.
The entire film is lazy. The fun is gone, most of the laughs are from The Hoff, but even that wears thin quickly. Gary Busey has a small role in the beginning, the film seriously needed more of him. He never had the opportunity to get his crazy on. The scene where he bites the head off the fish and spits it out is in the trailer, that's all he does. Ving Rhames has his best part ruined in the trailer a well. The film doesn't take itself seriously, which is obvious from the get go with dead fart jokes, but the comedy is more miss than hit. I laughed twice, one involving child endangerment the other is the Baywatch parody.
The naked women were even excessive and unneeded. It all feels forced to capture the exact same formula of the first, but the water park setting doesn't work for that. One thing this film lacked were the Kelly Brook and Riley Steele characters. Here Koechner fires all the lifeguards and hires strippers. The stripper lifeguards do nothing, opportunity wasted.
A ridiculous sex scene puts this film over the top. The scene doesn't play it funny enough, or grotesque enough. It's caught in some odd place in the middle. Yet the film seems to keep the tradition of severed penises afloat. Absolutely no plot whatsoever. The original at least tried, the sequel makes no effort. The attack is actually boring. Not as gory or as fun as the original. It seemed to be cut fairly badly too.
This film is tamer, lamer and something that rhymes with lamer. It makes no effort at all. Usually with sequels you want to go bigger and better, not the case with Piranha 3DD. The film is incredibly short, so expect to see ten or so minutes of outtakes during the credits. Even going in expecting it to be bad doesn't prepare you for the awfulness you will endure.
0.5
For comparison, here is my Piranha review. (http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?t=23462&highlight=piranha)