can't we all just get along?

[Memnon]

I'm kidding of course with the thread title. Obviously we aren't all going to get along all the time... that would be unrealistic, and dang boring. Heck, I'm most certainly not the nicest person around, but I do at least try to give the benefit of the doubt to people here.

However, the longer I'm a MoFo, the more I've been noticing the snide remarks, put downs, insane levels of grammar/spelling/punctuation policing, and all around bad attitude of some people.

What the heck is the point of all that?

I agree that there are some times when things are said that a not so nice reply or 2 would actually make sense, that's fine, I've done that myself a few times, but there are plenty of other times that people just slam a poster for no reason that seems to make any real sense.

Why automatically attack someone's thread topic, just because you happen to think its seems silly to have? How is that at all constructive? Besides, unless you are the moderator or an admin, controlling what is posted, what right do you have to declare a thread worthy or not?

What purpose does it serve to be the 3rd, or 4th, or 5th person in a thread to attack someone for creating a thread that they may have been able to find by doing a search (heck, I just realized I didn't do a search on this topic before creating the thread)?

I could go on, but I think I'll just sit back and wait for the types of comments I'm talking about and thinking of, be applied to this thread...

[Sedai]

Well, I am a dick, so that's my excuse.

Can't speak for the others.

You CAN weed those people (read:me) out of your MoFo experience, though, if you like. Just pop the username on your ignore list...


Really though... I am actually a super nice and easy going person in the real (some say TOO nice, and people walk all over me), but I do tend to have a gruffer, more feisty persona online from time to time...sort of like role playing, I guess. It's the dark mirror in which I cast my bottled up dark reflection.

[Yoda]

Hm, perhaps I haven't been looking hard enough, but I don't recall very much of the kind of things you're talking about.

For example, people definitely get a bit of a scolding when they create a thread that already exists, but I don't know that it ever happens 4-5 times. Usually just once. And even then, it's usually a thread topic so basic and simple that you'd have to be pretty dense to think it hasn't come up many times before.

I think MoFos get rude not so much when someone ignores the rules, but when they perceive that someone clearly hasn't invested even the slightest bit of thought in what they're posting. When someone saunters onto a board with over 400,000 posts and starts a thread called "favorite action movies" in the wrong forum, I don't lose sleep when someone else points out how silly that is.

Ditto for spelling and grammar; I haven't noticed people being "put down" for it much, unless its truly horrendous, and recurring. Usually at the level where you can't always understand what's being said.

I'm sure we can find examples of people going overboard, but I spend a lot of time here, and while I won't defend vitriol, I find it usually corresponds pretty reasonably to the level of carelessness being exhibited.

All that said, I admit that most MoFos do not suffer fools very well, and most would rather see careless people simply leave. I don't necessarily agree with that philosophy, but in most cases the people treated roughly are clearly looking for a message board experience very different from most of the members here.

[nebbit]

, I'm most certainly not the nicest person around,
Your not :eek:

[Memnon]

Hm, perhaps I haven't been looking hard enough, but I don't recall very much of the kind of things you're talking about.

For example, people definitely get a bit of a scolding when they create a thread that already exists, but I don't know that it ever happens 4-5 times. Usually just once. And even then, it's usually a thread topic so basic and simple that you'd have to be pretty dense to think it hasn't come up many times before.

I think MoFos get rude not so much when someone ignores the rules, but when they perceive that someone clearly hasn't invested even the slightest bit of thought in what they're posting. When someone saunters onto a board with over 400,000 posts and starts a thread called "favorite action movies" in the wrong forum, I don't lose sleep when someone else points out how silly that is.

Ditto for spelling and grammar; I haven't noticed people being "put down" for it much, unless its truly horrendous, and recurring. Usually at the level where you can't always understand what's being said.

I'm sure we can find examples of people going overboard, but I spend a lot of time here, and while I won't defend vitriol, I find it usually corresponds pretty reasonably to the level of carelessness being exhibited.

All that said, I admit that most MoFos do not suffer fools very well, and most would rather see careless people simply leave. I don't necessarily agree with that philosophy, but in most cases the people treated roughly are clearly looking for a message board experience very different from most of the members here.

I specifically left out names, threads and such, as I didn't feel pointing fingers would be needed, but I do think there are plenty to these types of things that are going through, especially by some "established" members, that I think might be overlooked simply because of the fact that they have been here so long. If I can figure out how to do it right, I will PM you with the specific response that got me to create this thread... remember that it is only one example though...

[7thson]

I will admit that I get testy about a few things, but usually it is not without merit (at least imo). Does that make it alright? Not always and I have had a post or two deleted over my few years here. My problem is that I post without counting to ten now and then. I also think that sometimes a remark that seems uncalled for is really the result of many things and not just a potshot. I think the regulars get a feel for each other moreso than I have seen in any other forum/online communities I frequent. Some remarks may seem bitter or just downright mean, but in my case at least I rarely (will not say never) try to make things drawn out. Sometimes I will say WTH?, and for some reason people take that as meaning what the hell is your problem? No it just means what the hell, please explain your side to me, it does not mean I will disagree or not understand. I am working on counting to 10 before posting as I have mentioned. Political threads tend to set me off the most and sometimes things hit a personal nerve, but I can say that just because I disagree with someone and I can be gruff sometimes does not mean I do not respect you.

After saying all of that I do not think I have seen more than the normal amount of search function chiding or anything else than I usually do. I do think that after a person has been told once or twice about it in a single thread, then piling it on can be a bit unsettling for someone new. I certainly remember my early encounters with SB and Holds on a thread or two I started, it turned out I was right of course because the threads I started really did not belong in the old ones, but that is alright I forgave 'em.;)
If I can find it I will come back and put the link to my newbie admonishment here. Link (http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?t=5714) Ahh found one, the search function does work. And a thread created directly in response to my repimand: Link2 (http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?t=5722).

[Memnon]

For example, people definitely get a bit of a scolding when they create a thread that already exists, but I don't know that it ever happens 4-5 times. Usually just once.


5 may be a bit high, but why even 2 or 3 times? If you are reading the posts to a thread, and you see that someone, especially an admin, has made a comment about a thread existing, why should it be mentioned again? I honestly am not going to go back through all the threads to find examples of this, but the next time I see this (and I do think it happens much more than you think), I will be sure to mention it.


I think MoFos get rude not so much when someone ignores the rules, but when they perceive that someone clearly hasn't invested even the slightest bit of thought in what they're posting. When someone saunters onto a board with over 400,000 posts and starts a thread called "favorite action movies" in the wrong forum, I don't lose sleep when someone else points out how silly that is.


Making a point of something is fine, but its all in the way its done. There have been plenty of times when the method used to tell someone that a thread is a repeat, or in the wrong place, or whatever, is far from just pointing out that its silly. They are pretty much told that they must be stupid since they don't know everything about how the board functions...



Ditto for spelling and grammar; I haven't noticed people being "put down" for it much, unless its truly horrendous, and recurring. Usually at the level where you can't always understand what's being said.


This one is not so much put downs, as some people thinking everyone should be able to write to the same standards as those that know every little point of grammar, spelling and punctuation in the English language. I would think, with the multinational nature of this board, that people would be more understanding of the fact that English is not always someone's first language.
Also, while I am not a fan of the shortening, and re-spelling of words that is much more common today, especially with younger people, it is a fact of our text messaging culture that we will be seeing this more and more. Language evolves, deal with it...

[Sir Toose]

I pretty much pride myself on my restraint these days :D

If you think I'm too rough on anyone I'd like to hear about it. I usually give at least one or two polite warnings before I unload on anyone.

I think for some the acid response is a part of their persona. If I'm doing it, I don't really mean to unless I think someone has gone way overboard.

[Sir Toose]

And a thread created directly in response to my repimand: Link2 (http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?t=5722).

Dude. I had your back from day ONE. Better respect, yo.

:D

[adidasss]

Well, I am a dick, so that's my excuse.

Can't speak for the others.

You CAN weed those people (read:me) out of your MoFo experience, though, if you like. Just pop the username on your ignore list...


Really though... I am actually a super nice and easy going person in the real (some say TOO nice, and people walk all over me), but I do tend to have a gruffer, more feisty persona online from time to time...sort of like role playing, I guess. It's the dark mirror in which I cast my bottled up dark reflection.

Knock it off Mikey. In the almost 3 years I've been here I don't recall you being a particular dick to anyone. You're a nice person on line as well as off line (I'd imagine), so I'm not sure why you keep reiterating this...:\

I on the other hand...;)

Anyhoo, I'd venture a guess that Memnon here is referring to Holden. It's been well established on more than one occasion that the man is a dick, but also the greatest contributor this site has ever had. And as for the supposed hostility of the site in general, you apparently don't get around too much, internet wise...I'm on several forums and this one is by far the most civilized...if people seem to be impatient sometimes, it's because most have been here for years and get tired of repeating the same stuff over and over again...

[Memnon]

I pretty much pride myself on my restraint these days :D

If you think I'm too rough on anyone I'd like to hear about it. I usually give at least one or two polite warnings before I unload on anyone.

I think for some the acid response is a part of their persona. If I'm doing it, I don't really mean to unless I think someone has gone way overboard.

Actually Toose, I have noticed your restraint.. your devilish side is still there of course, but how could we expect anything less?

[Memnon]

And as for the supposed hostility of the site in general, you apparently don't get around too much, internet wise...I'm on several forums and this one is by far the most civilized...if people seem to be impatient sometimes, it's because most have been here for years and get tired of repeating the same stuff over and over again...


Sorry, but you are way off, I am most certainly around the internet a lot, I do know what boards are often like and I definitely didn't mean that there is a general hostility on this site... Its the fact that this site IS so civilized in general that made me bring this topic up in the first place...

[adidasss]

Ok, now I'm confused, what're you bitching about...exactly...? You can't deal with the fact the not everyone is as nice, patient and polite as you? Or are you proposing this forum become completely antiseptic and remove all its "shady" characters...?

[7thson]

Dude. I had your back from day ONE. Better respect, yo.

:D

It is there dude no doubt.:)

[Sedai]

Also, while I am not a fan of the shortening, and re-spelling of words that is much more common today, especially with younger people, it is a fact of our text messaging culture that we will be seeing this more and more. Language evolves, deal with it...

Evolves? I wouldn't choose that word, as texting is clearly an example of linguistic de-evolution. It's clearly less expressive. Typing out words with out thumbs into a TELEPHONE (HELLOOOOOOOOOOOO, you can friggin TALK into it, GENIUS) is not progress, in ANY way, shape or form.

What I love, is when I see 6 kids in the same room, all staring at their cell-phones, texting each other! That is just the epitome of idiocy, to me.

Bye Jimmy, have fun at school!

http://a862.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/65/l_a26d600a1dc5061f1952758913f4673d.jpg
"Oh man, that girl is drooling, I better text her to let her know!"


I, for one, am not about to accept the fact that language is changing just because kids are too lazy of socially stunted to actually SPEAK to someone.

http://mixtapemagazin.files.wordpress.com/2007/04/porcupine_tree_foabp.jpg

Get used to kids like this!

[Monkeypunch]

This one is not so much put downs, as some people thinking everyone should be able to write to the same standards as those that know every little point of grammar, spelling and punctuation in the English language. I would think, with the multinational nature of this board, that people would be more understanding of the fact that English is not always someone's first language.
Also, while I am not a fan of the shortening, and re-spelling of words that is much more common today, especially with younger people, it is a fact of our text messaging culture that we will be seeing this more and more. Language evolves, deal with it...

People who speak english as a second language aren't a big problem, because they are trying to speak and write it to the best of their ability. The text/net speak, however, is just laziness. It's annoying to read and it's frustrating to people who are trying to make valid, well thought out posts to see "dood u shuld see this muvie it roxxors!!!111!"

[7thson]

"dood u shuld see this muvie it roxxors!!!111!"
WTH?

;)

[adidasss]

well thought out posts to see "dood u shuld see this muvie it roxxors!!!111!"
Those people aren't lazy, they're idiots...:yup:

[Memnon]

Ok, now I'm confused, what're you bitching about...exactly...? You can't deal with the fact the not everyone is as nice, patient and polite as you? Or are you proposing this forum become completely antiseptic...?


you want an example?

go F off for your dumb comment!!! If you can't understand what I'm saying, then go the hell away from this thread!
Who the HELL are you to be saying that I'm "bitching" about things, and that YOU think I can't deal with people? Get a damn clue!

That would be an example of what I'm talking about, and honestly,that's kind of the feeling I had when I read your post. You want someone who not only deals with people not being nice, but actually would rather beat your head in for a post that came across as condescending as yours did.. you have you man right here.

...but seriously, you obviously don't get what I'm saying (and from the tone that came across in your post, I'd rather just ignore you, but what the hell, I'll give it another shot), its the idiosyncratic posts here that drove the thread... don't be stupid and think I'm saying there should be no conflict or anything, but really, what is the point in posting comments that are purposefully spiteful and such?

[Sedai]

True dat, Monkey...

[adidasss]

you want an example?

go F off for your dumb comment!!! If you can't understand what I'm saying, then go the hell away from this thread!
Who the HELL are you to be saying that I'm "bitching" about things, and that YOU think I can't deal with people? Get a damn clue!
Exaggerate much?:rolleyes: I'd say those kinds of posts are too few and far between to even be mentioned...and could only be a result of a heated debate and/or provocation. :\

...but seriously, you obviously don't get what I'm saying (and from the tone that came across in your post, I'd rather just ignore you, but what the hell, I'll give it another shot), its the idiosyncratic posts here that drove the thread... don't be stupid and think I'm saying there should be no conflict or anything, but really, what is the point in posting comments that are purposefully spiteful and such? Well gosh darn it, because it just feels good to put someone down once in a while...:yup:

[7thson]

Well gosh darn it, because it just feels good to put someone down once in a while...:yup:


I knew there had to be a motivation for your hatred of the West, I just knew it.;)

[Ðèstîñy]

Really though... I am actually a super nice and easy going person in the real (some say TOO nice, and people walk all over me)

Until they drive you off the road, and make you spill your chilli! ;)


*edit*

Why don't you just report any that truly bother you?

Click the ! on the offending post.

Note: This is ONLY to be used to report spam, advertising messages, and problematic (harassment, fighting, or rude) posts.

[7thson]

Click the ! on the offending post.

(harassment, fighting, or rude) posts.

Yikes, I had no idea the ! existed till now....;)

[Ðèstîñy]

Wth?

[Tatanka]

In general, I feel it's best to try and default to a "benefit-of-the-doubt" rule with posts (excepting those wherein the sentiments are quite obvious due to some flavorful word-choice, etc.). The main reason is because a fantastic amount of the communication process is lost from the person to the keyboard (in the form of non-verbal, physical cues that we take for granted)....but we all know this. While we can thank the emoticon for helping to round out what we're feeling, nothing will replace the physical, face-to-face encounter. We all know that much, too.

I find the established MoFo's, even when waxing "vitriolic," most often speak truth somewhere in the rant, AND most often are doing so in the case of someone who, ignominiously, refuse to adapt and learn from someone who obviously towers over them in life experience, (not to mention the cinematic).

We should empower the grammar/spelling police, the "Conan the Grammarians" of the forum. They wield the two-edged sword(s) ensuring the civility to which we are endeared. The English language has not come to us lightly, nor without beauty and complexity. As Sedai has pointed out, it might even be in danger. Language does evolve, but so did our less-upright, hairier and more angularly-sloped-forehead progenitors into oblivion.:D

[7thson]

We should empower the grammar/spelling police, the "Conan the Grammarians" of the forum. They wield the two-edged sword(s) ensuring the civility to which we are endeared. .:D


Damn!!! ... I am hot & bothered 'bout right now...;)

[Sedai]

Yeah...Tatanka is seeming damn cool to me right about now... Glad you are sticking around, T.

:yup:

[Tatanka]

Yeah...Tatanka is seeming damn cool to me right about now... Glad you are sticking around, T.

:yup:
Thanks Sedai- I am much obliged. This is a great place to be.:cool:

[martian leader]

Your title for the post sounds like president dale from mars attacks!!

ACK ACK ACK ACK!!


http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/501913Mars-Attacks-Posters.jpg

http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/ma_822.jpg

http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/ma_824.jpg

http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/ma_817.jpg

martian leader

[mark f]

Of course it does, but Mars Attacks! obviously stole it from Rodney King. By the way, how did you find this site? I can ask because I've seen you at another site. :)

[Powdered Water]

Is he from that site that shall not be named?

[mark f]

Nope. At least, I wouldn't know.

[Powdered Water]

What's cool is... I completely understand what you just said. :D

[martian leader]

Of course it does, but Mars Attacks! obviously stole it from Rodney King. By the way, how did you find this site? I can ask because I've seen you at another site. :)

Your title for the post sounds like president dale from mars attacks!!

ACK ACK ACK ACK!!


http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/501913Mars-Attacks-Posters.jpg



martian leader



I DID A GOOGLE SEARCH ONE NIGHT AND FOUND IT.

MARTIAN LEADER

[Powdered Water]

Jesus, how much longer are you going to be here exactly?

[nebbit]

Jesus, how much longer are you going to be here exactly?
Who gives an ACK ;D

[Caitlyn]

I'm out of bubblegum....

[martian leader]

Do You Want Me To Leave Or Are You Just Joking?

Martian Leader

[mark f]

You're OK. Just tell us something different about yourself. You don't remember my user name from another site?

[martian leader]

NO SORRY
http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/charlie3.jpg

http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/martianleader28.jpg

MARTIAN LEADER

[Caitlyn]

NO SORRY
http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/charlie3.jpg

http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn107/martianleader1/martianleader28.jpg

MARTIAN LEADER



Did you read the note I left you?

[John McClane]

No, we can't be friends. You smell funny and don't share your LEGOs. :p

[nebbit]

Do You Want Me To Leave Or Are You Just Joking?
Just sick of reading about Martians http://bestsmileys.com/aliens/14.gif