We've got shirts! We have two basic designs, which we have creatively titlted "First Design" and "Second Design." Because "Thing 1 and Thing 2" were already taken:

I just want a shirt

Of course you do. Just choose either the first design or the second design.

I lack imagination and cannot picture how these would look on garments

My sympathies. Does this help? You'll have to imagine the heads. Sorry about that.

The head thing is freaking me out. Got any on actual people?

Man, are you high maintenance. Okay, here's a few:

What if I want one of your indisputably hilarious slogans on the back?

Why are you being so difficult? Okay, okay. This is fine.

• Now With 28% More Bruce Willis (first / second)
• An Offer You Can't Refuse (first / second)
• Mischief. Mayhem. Movies. (first / second)

If you want a specific combination of slogan/site name/design, just drop me a message and I'll put it together. Virtually any combination is fine: either design, any slogan, any site name format, softer material, nothing on the back, et cetera. And we can put any of these design's on a women's cut shirt, too, in addition to the default unisex.