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The People's Republic of Clogher
Now that Russell Brand has thrown his weight (8 stone, wringing wet) behind Red Ed, will we see more politicos pandering to zeitgeist-y celebs?

Neva 4get:

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"Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how the Tatty 100 is done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves." - Brendan Behan



Just because it made me laugh. In The Guardian they ran this to promote Charlie Brooker's Electoral Wipe, which was on last night if you missed go, do yourself a favour and hit iPlayer.

A beginner's guide to the election by TV's Philomena Cunk

Why should you vote?

They say that if you don’t vote, you can’t complain. But the Queen doesn’t vote and she looks pissed off with everything unless it’s a horse. Mind you, I’d probably have a face like that if I kept getting serenaded by Gary Barlow.

Can you explain Farage, Clegg, Cameron, Sturgeon and Miliband?

Farage is the new one who looks like Fozzie Bear trying to sneak into Parliament by putting Kermit on his shoulders, poking out the top of a stolen suit.

Clegg – I’ve got a trick for remembering which one he is: I think of which one I can’t remember and that’s him.

Cameron is the one who was born to rule, but they keep having elections instead, which you can see gets right on his wick.

Sturgeon is the one who looks like an auntie who’s come to pick one of the others up.

Miliband reminds me of when I was in Aldi and found this squashy CBeebies thing on the floor that a baby had dropped. Everyone had trod its face to bits, but it still had this big smile, maybe because it knew somebody loved it.

What is a coalition?

It’s when two cars bump into each other, but not so badly that anyone’s dead.

How do you get “brain fade”?

It’s when you get a fact wrong and realise afterwards that you have done it. I have never had one of those. Actually, I have once.

Who has been the best in the debates?

The Scotch woman seemed to go down quite well. I think she’d make a good prime minister if one day we ever let women do that.

Who are you voting for and why?

I’m voting tactically. Like when more people voted for the upside-down dancers than voted for Susan Boyle, but she still got to be the most famous for a bit. So I’m walking proudly into that dry wooden shower-like thing at the primary school and putting my cross in the Tactical party box.
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Thursday Next's Avatar
I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
I watched that last night. I really liked the bit where nobody votes and Russell Brand is declared Prime Minister.



That was the only time that Russell Brand thing has been funny this year. I didn't like the one they did during the regular series.

I loved Philomena's intro to democracy. It went something like:

"Democracy was invented by the Greeks and like thick yoghurt, sodomy and triangles, it went on to spread around the world/"



The People's Republic of Clogher
Wow. I don't know who needs fixing more urgently - Labour, the Lib Dems, UKIP or Michelle Gildernew's ego.

I'm taking solace in the fact that it looks like the DUP won't be anyone's kingmaker. Can you imagine Deputy PM Sammy Wilson?



I'm thanking God for that too Tatty. Seeing Wilson being interviewed last night gave me the shudders thinking what might be.
I'm absolutely gutted this morning...but I can't say I'm as upset as in 1987 when Thatcher got in for a third term, that was gutting and astounding, this time sadly it's not astounding
So Miliband has stepped away from the wreckage and left Labour supporters hoping they don't choose the weakest of the bunch next time.



The People's Republic of Clogher
Since I moved back here, Westminster politics has become increasingly distant to me. Our 18 MPs are only called on to become legislators in times of strife for a ruling party - The last time that happened was the UUP propping up Major's last few years in power but I can see it happening again with such a slim Tory majority.

A couple of by-elections could shrink it so that the DUP (or even the UUP's two seats) could come into play...

I stayed up until about 3am, increasingly boggled at how Labour were crumbling and not just in Scotland. Andy Burnham for the new leader? He's not a Miliband, has links to the Blair glory days and, crucially for me, was the only leadership candidate last time round who visited NI and promised proper party mobilisation here.

Of course, if he actually becomes Labour leader, we'll see how that works out.



The only part of me that wants Andy Burnham as Labour leader is the part which won't have to watch him on Question Time for the next five years. Hate that bloke. I think I'd like Yvette Cooper to take over. Mainly because Ed Balls lost his seat, so having his wife as the leader (which he also lost to Milliband last time ) would just be wonderful. I think I hate him more than Burnham.



I'm not very well versed in british politics, but what I'm ost interested in is the independance of Scotland (I live in Québec where some of us want to separate from Canada)


I'm very happy to see that Scotland voted for the SNP which sends a very clear message. It could mean that the SNP have the balance of the power (that's how we call it in french I don't know how in English) which means that the 56 elected deputies could have some sort of pollitical power.
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I don't know anything about this guy, but I did find this amusing as an illustration of politicians in general and their talking points:
Yep, Dr. King has a lot to answer for, doesn't he?



The People's Republic of Clogher
I don't know anything about this guy
He's got an evil brother who left politics in a huff (and in a reckless and provocative manner, according to Ed) and is now in charge of International Rescue. Or something.

I'm pretty stoked to find out that the guy who toppled Willie McRea in South Antrim is Chris de Burgh's cousin! From this:



To this:




King's I have a dream speech. The reason people still remember that is because he repeats it at the start of each stanza in the middle section. Doesn't he? Damn. Now I'm doubting myself.



Let the night air cool you off
Did you guys hear the good news about the British elections?

The only thing I am upset about is Ed Balls losing, because every country should have somebody named Balls in elected office.


P.S. I don't know anything about British politics.



Conservatives in power for the past 4 years with Lib Dems following their every move and keeping them, sort of in check.


Conservatives in power for the next 4 years with nobody to track them?


The Conservatives in Britain stand for:
Rich people stepping on the poor so they can make more money
Rich people getting tax cuts so they can make more money
Already millionaire politicians getting expense claims, for instance £250,000 for a moat on their mansion
Poor people getting stepped on by the rich
Small businesses held back from succeeding if success means a bigger company will lose money
0 hour contracts for people who work so they technically get paid less than Minimum Wage
Poor people getting hit with heavy tax rates to balance out the rich getting tax cuts
Low income workers getting heavier tax rates than high earners and millionaires
Poor people getting less from the benefit system
Low income families getting no help from the system


We are totally f*cked. Unless you're a millionaire, billionaire, or can claim expenses, you may as well just get out of your home now before the Conservatives bankrupt you and take it anyway.



The People's Republic of Clogher
King's I have a dream speech. The reason people still remember that is because he repeats it at the start of each stanza in the middle section. Doesn't he? Damn. Now I'm doubting myself.
http://www.daybreakrecordings.com/

King's problem was that he didn't sing Country.



0 hour contracts for people who work so they technically get paid less
This is the one thing I thought Miliband had right. Like you say, no one can live a normal life working like this, but as long as they are classed as employed by the DWP, the government don't care. I know a few people who have worked these shifts and have been made homeless in the past 12 months. I was homeless after they stopped my money for 6 months, because I turned down such a job. Bast*rds!