The witty postyard
 

Life is like a box of nails, if God wants to use you, well then your screwed.
Although nails do not exactly screw in, so I guess we do not make good screws, but if we were treated right then we could become the ultimate screws and actually hold things together right instead of just getting hammered to satisy a power mad being, eh?

When a child helps because they feel they have too the result is far less effective than when they help because they want too.

Trying to improve one's moral through active restraint proves to be uncivilised to headless pensioners.

The last thing someone sees before they die is the first thing they will see in the afterlife.

A shattered dream needs mending not ridicule.

It doesn't matter that the Active Users tag is in alphabetical order, for you are always at the front of the list.

Where have all the cowgirls gone?

"Life is too important to take seriously"

A wiseman once said, that only true love can break a man's heart. That man never dropped his hotdog.

If you look over your left shoulder and see me coming then you might want to look over your right one.

I am a compulsive liar.

"I Wanna Be a Cowboy"

Death shadows me like a comforting cloak… watching… waiting… but I have no fear… for it is the reality in which I live.

If you turn over a stone and find nothing but dirt do you put the stone back?

Personal favorite:

At the end of the game, both the pawn and the king go into the same box.

"I'm Coo-Coo for Cocoa Puffs!"



*sorry*

Choose a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life

You can't hold a man down without staying down with him

The early bird catches the worm, but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese.

If you see me running, keep up. I'm on the bomb squad. -John Doe, interviewed after the First attack on the WTC

***** Happens -A lot of people

A man saw a spider in a drain, fighting for it's life, and it got out, the next day he saw the same spider, in the same drain, and decided to pull it out, and set it free, he returned the day after that to find the spider where he had left it, on it's back, twitching it's legs. Moral, we have no right to impose our will on others because we are too vain to accept the fact that we may not know what's best for everyone else. -William Peterson

What are we other than the sum of our experiences? -DaVinci

The whole is greater than the sum of it's parts. -also Davinci

If everything seems to be going well, you must have overlooked something. -Steven Wright

A conscience it what hurts when everything else feels good. -Steven Wright

Shin-a device for finding furniture in the dark. -Steven Wright

"Pain can blind us, and send us down many bad roads, like anger, misery, and evil. It is then, that we need a Brian, or a Jay, to clear our vision, and guide us back to the road of good things, and fun times." -Ian Kozar